I have been to Pattaya, yes there are bars and sometimes you have men and women heading off to hotels, that happens in lots of places. Thai women are lucky when they are 35 or 45 years old they still look like teenagers. Really pisses off Farang (foreign) women! Phuket is very popular with women, it is not unusual to see a 50 year old woman with two "boytoys" - that's life! But Phuket does have nice beaches and restaurants.
In Pattaya you can find cheaper accommodation than Phuket or Bangkok. Transportation is cheap at only 10 baht from fixed route baht buses. Lots of good restaurants, malls, many street vendors and flea markets. Beach at Pattaya is only good for sunbathing, shopping, walking or malls and bars - tourists usually use the pools in their hotels or go to nearby Jomtien.
Pattaya is also a top destination for couples, even family groups with children. Many of these tourists return year after year. Yes, there are bars but no one forces anyone into a bar! Many retirees live in Pattaya, often after their wives have passed away.
You will see more nudity and crudeness on a beach in Europe or the US! Visit Amsterdam, Rotterdam, Hamburg, Frankfurt, Nevada and you will see hookers and customers. Even in London they have hookers plying tourists.
Any visitor to Pattaya who wants to avoid some of the bars could stay in the Naklua or Jomtien area of Pattaya. Pattaya is around 125 baht and only 2 hours by bus from the Ekamai bus station in Bangkok, if someone doesn't care for cheaper hotels, good restaurants and cheap 10 baht transportation in a beach setting they they can easily return to Bangkok.
Both Bangkok and Phuket have bars too! Phuket has the Patong area and Bangkok has the Patpong, Nana and Soi Cowboy areas. Perhaps no one should visit Bangkok or Phuket!