Money, and Emotional Attachment to Things

Last night Merry Andrew and I went to Target and I bought him a new micro wave oven to replace the one he bought at a yard sale a few years ago to replace the one that was in our apartment and wore out (mind you this micro wave is presently in a storage unit, )and I know that he will want to put the latest worn out micro wave in storage also, so he will have two worn out micro wave units just in case.

When cleaning out the apartment for the move to Hawaii, stuff that I had allocated to go to Goodwill Industries somehow ended up in the storage unit. There are bundles of smelly National Geographics, boxes of paperbacks. Clothes he wore in high school.

Now get this, for what he has paid out in storage fees for useless junk, he could have bought a new car.

Thank you for starting this thread, now I have a place to vent.

The Boston apartment is virtually impossible to turn around in there is so much clutter.

This has to be a psychological disorder. Is there a name for it. Sometimes it threatens my sanity.

I have become a minimalist.

I'm guilty of a bit of emotionally motivating hoarding myself. My To Read shelves are well stocked--overflowing. I've had to resort to a bit of double shelving so that all the books will fit. I am absolutely Not In Danger of running out of new books to read for at least three months and probably for five months.

Still, over the weekend, I had a crisis. I coped--magnificently and even-temperedly. Then I logged onto Amazon and ordered five more second hand books.

A few weeks ago I was shopping with a friend. I found her standing in front of a sale rack of heavily discounted black slacks chanting, "I do not need another pair of black slacks. I do not need another pair of black slacks."

In the last three months Mr. Noddy has purchased at least 19 flashlights (and batteries for the flashlights). I find this excessive, but I realize that there are worse addictions than flashlights.

I was checking on the internet and found a lot of entries about compulsive hoarding and one stated that hoarding creates a false sense of permanance.

Also that hoarding is an indication of obsessive-compulsive disorder.

So whatever it is it's not quite normal.

Oh my god. He just lifted the old micro wave oven off the top of the apartment size refrigerator and there was eight years worth of mouse doo-doo under it. Yuk. I wouldn't do it, so he put on rubber gloves and cleaned the doo-doo off and then wiped it down with clorox wipes.

New micro wave oven on top of fridge. New toaster oven on top of new micro wave oven. See MA looking at old micro wave oven with tears in his eyes. He fondles it and says goodbye old friend, we have shared many cups of coffee. I can feel his anguish.

He looks at me, I shake my head and point to the door. To the dumpster.

I've never been an accumulator but now I'm even worse. I am a rolling stone that gathers no moss. I took practically nothing from the house nor do I want it. I love this freedom to be able to go anywhere at will. I don't even have all my personal possessions which consist primarily of art supplies, sewing stuff, art books, and clothing. I am going to store all that stuff somewhere and just boogy with a backpack (almost)

I believe it -- I remember the photo of the sofa from Iowa (and the rest of the room).

I was a gatherer for a while but I've put the brakes on. I honestly say, "Time" to those who ask what I'd like for this gift or that. For my 50th last year I asked the girls to spend the day with me, ditto Mother's Day. I'm saying the same thing about Christmas. We are now planning evenings out with extended family rather than filling up each other's houses with more stuff. I don't need or want things. I do like to share time with friends and family.

With regards to storage units, I have some strong feelings about them.

For years, I thought that their only purpose was for burglars to stash away "loot" from heists. Now I know better. Then I thought that they were handy places to put things in while you are in a small apartment, waiting to close on a new house.

I know now that there are some people who utilize storage units in place of an attic. In other words, they pay good money to store things in them that they will never again use, but can't bear to part with.

Now that is NUTS.

[size=7]I am glad that Mr. P. has never discovered storage units!!![/size]

Sounds like they have an attachment problem My uncle was like that - a real packrat. It was extremely organized, though, and eventually he probably did find a place for all those screws and whatnots.

Sure there is. It's called Collyer's Mansion/Collyer Brothers Syndrome: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Collyer_brothers
Also called compulsive hoarding: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Compulsive_hoarding

****! You know damn near everything!

Doesn't she, though :-D

Jespah I read these to him, and him will not talk to me.

I have a book called something like....why we collect things....I tried to find it on Amazon but that's probably not even close to the actual title...but anyway, it divides the things people collect into categories...dolls, baseball cards, Mickey Mouse, etc and then gives the psychological reasons behind these specific collections/hoardings...it doesn't include every single thing that is collected, but with a little reasoning you can figure out what category your vice fits in....it's a neat book.

Every person that had ever seen the book...on my desk or shelf...would ask me to tell them why they collected {x} and I would always say...Eh, you really don't want to know, you won't like what I tell you. Never worked, I told them, they were not happy, I hid the book.

I sold my last house with almost all furniture in it. The buyer wanted them and they fit perfectly in that house. Perfect! I had no problem parting with it.

I have very little attachment to things per se. I do love my sectional
sofa, as I haven't found anything that's more comfortable. I also own
a few antiques I treasure, but that's about it. I don't collect and I don't
keep things indefinite.

Naah, that would take all the mystery outta life.

Seriously, the only reason I know this is because the NY Times had something in their Science section about it a few years ago, and discussions about it come up from time to time. Pretty damn disturbing when emergency workers are unable to do their jobs because someone can't part with a torn page out of a 1971 National Geographic.

I like things spartan and uncluttered. I'm definitely NOT a hoarder.

I used to have a difficult time parting with things-- till I moved out of the place I'd lived in the longest and realized I'd accumulated way too much stuff. I was ruthless about throwing stuff away or giving it away, but prior to moving I kept a lot of stuff out of an emotional attachment.

Pheonix, I don't agree with you, though, about it not being about the money-- I think in the case of the pieces of furniture you're trying to sell, it is about at least getting what is considered by Mr. P to be a reasonable return on his investment.

I also think it could be regarding the circumstances you were raised in. My husband, although not poor, did not have much as a child. His parents divorced when he was young so they did have difficulty financially. He had worked as a paper boy as soon as he was old enough and anything extra he had to earn on his own.

I can see those same sort of traits that some of you described. Possibly not the pack rat, but he likes to have the best in a sense. When we went to buy a car for example, I am more practical in choosing - I would prefer not all the bells and whistles, but what we need. He wants new and the bells and whistles. So we typically compromise - he gets those fancy extras that mean more to him - I keep the prices down by saying you won't even use AB or C.

But as far as worth, I think we both value things similarly - for example when we sell our house, we understand that the market price may be different from what we think our home is worth.