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I have a genetic condition that causes male breasts

 
 
Mon 16 Jun, 2014 10:48 pm
I have a genetic condition known as gynecomastia. I'm very skinny, but i have breasts. To most people when i have my shirt on I appear like a very fit young man with a muscular chest. But the truth is I have breasts. I've been very depressed for most of my life because of this. Sometimes I don't even feel like a human being. More like a subhuman monster. I have been bullied by people who have seen me with my shirt off. But the worst has been the women. A lot of women pay attention to me, and I have had many experiences with women. Women have told me that I'm good looking, But most women think I'm really muscular until they see me without my shirt. Women have been extremely cruel to me because of my condition. The worst ones are the ones who jiggle my breasts and then laugh. It makes me wish I was dead. While I've had quite a few expereiences with women, I've always been dumped. Oh, they'll say it's not about the breasts, but I see how they look at me when they first find out. Women are so cruel. I try everyday to be positive and outgoing. I try so hard not to be negative. I don't think anyone realizes how unhappy I am inside. I have a lot of friends, but the women are so cruel. I've even dated overweight women and even they mock me. I didn't ask to be born this way! Exercise doesn't make them go away. I'm skinny as a rail because I run and exercise all the time. Nothing can make them go away except surgery, but it's very expensive and insurance considers it "elective" surgery because it's "non life threatening" but i consider it "life threatening" because sometimes I really wish i was dead. I support myslef now and could never afford the surgery. Sometimes I just don't understand why i go on.
 
SadTiger
 
  -1  
Tue 17 Jun, 2014 02:58 am
@SadTiger,
Well, now i feel stupid for posting this here. I guess i am subhuman. dumb website anyway
jespah
 
  4  
Wed 18 Jun, 2014 05:53 am
@SadTiger,
And that's what happens when people don't snap to it and answer you in four hours? You posted when a big chunk of this website is asleep or at work.

But here, I'll answer you. If it bothers you that much, if it ruining your life that badly, then have the surgery, insurance or no insurance. Yeah, it's expensive, so maybe see about seeing a psychiatrist first and, perhaps, a diagnosis of depression (because I bet you've got it) might spur your insurance company to at least cover the hospital stay or anesthesia or some other portion of the procedure.

Is it expensive? Yes. So is feeling crappy for your entire existence. Consider this a priority, and a goal, and work toward it like you would work toward buying a new car, or putting a down payment on a house. Will this bankrupt you? I have no idea. But you clearly seem very, very down, and have fixated on this condition as being the one thing that is keeping you from being happy (BTW, that is a dangerous thought process but hey, we'll go with it for now).

See an obstacle? Then find a way around it or through it. It might not be easy, but if you work toward your goal, you will know that you are going in the right direction.
SadTiger
 
  1  
Thu 19 Jun, 2014 02:40 am
@jespah,
I could never afford it! If i spend money on it i won't have money for rent or groceries, or gas, ect. It's not like i haven't thought about this before! I have tried every possible angel. I just can't afford it. Surgery is not an option for me

Even if i got the surgery i feel like anyone who only would care for me because i got did something to change my appearance doesn't really care about me anyway. Why are women so superficial? I think it's just sick. I would give anything to just be a regular fat man. Most fat men don't have breasts. I would trade my skinny body just to not have breasts. At least fat men are still viewed as men. But if a dumb brainless women like Lauren Scuggs walks into a plane propeller because she's stupid, men still think she's sexy. Even though she did that to herself. I had no choice I didn't do it to myself i was born with it. Lauren scruggs isn't viewed with hate. It's wrong how society treats people who are like me.
OmSigDAVID
 
  1  
Thu 19 Jun, 2014 03:17 am
@SadTiger,
Save up and get the surgery.
0 Replies
 
SadTiger
 
  1  
Thu 19 Jun, 2014 06:06 am
I am viewed as deformed. I have tried everything i possibly can to be fun and good to people. I exercise and dress nicely to be presentable, but i try even harder to be positive and nice to people and to be fun. Women are still hateful to me and mock me. Men are not as bad. In high school some men were bad, but now it's almost 100 percent women who are hateful.
0 Replies
 
jespah
 
  3  
Thu 19 Jun, 2014 08:40 am
@SadTiger,
Stop measuring yourself up to stupid ass Lauren Scruggs (who I had to Google; I had never heard of her).

Go on dating websites. Get some things squared away before dating anyone. E. g. find someone who shares your interests, your values, etc.

And, I might add, LOTS of overweight men have pretty serious breast tissue. You are far, far, far from the only one.

But seriously, get counseling. This is running your life and you are letting it.
0 Replies
 
Romeo Fabulini
 
  1  
Thu 19 Jun, 2014 08:54 am
Quote:
Nothing can make them go away except surgery, but it's very expensive

Well start saving your pennies same as for anything else
0 Replies
 
ehBeth
 
  2  
Mon 28 Jul, 2014 04:52 pm
@jespah,
jespah wrote:
Yeah, it's expensive, so maybe see about seeing a psychiatrist first and, perhaps, a diagnosis of depression (because I bet you've got it) might spur your insurance company to at least cover the hospital stay or anesthesia or some other portion of the procedure.


this is a definite possibility

it's not necessarily elective surgery

___

About a decade ago, my mother had surgery on her eyelids so that she could see properly. It was the same surgery that is generally considered elective cosmetic surgery, but as it had a functional component it was covered by government and private insurance.
0 Replies
 
ehBeth
 
  1  
Mon 28 Jul, 2014 04:53 pm
@SadTiger,
SadTiger wrote:
Women have told me that I'm good looking, But most women think I'm really muscular until they see me without my shirt.


do you tell your partners about the condition before they see you without a shirt for the first time?
ehBeth
 
  1  
Mon 28 Jul, 2014 04:54 pm
@SadTiger,
SadTiger wrote:
insurance considers it "elective" surgery because it's "non life threatening" but i consider it "life threatening" because sometimes I really wish i was dead. I support myslef now and could never afford the surgery.


do you have medical insurance? if so, have you looked into what your current carrier requires to provide coverage for the surgery?
0 Replies
 
SadTiger
 
  1  
Mon 28 Jul, 2014 05:54 pm
@ehBeth,
Quote:
do you tell your partners about the condition before they see you without a shirt for the first time?


Am I suppossed to wear a sandwich board that that sez "I have gynecomastia"? Why can't women just be less superficial? And they should be able to know just by hugging me or touching me there. I have dated large, heavy women, same results. One large woman made many jokes to face. Demeaned me. Called me "tits" as a nicname. I didn't ever call her "fatass". Guess i should just shut up and be a man? But let women make fun of me for "being a girl" with "bitch tits"?

The insurance says it's not life threatening. Won't cover it. I've tried many times to make it happen. It's not like I haven't been living with this forever.
ehBeth
 
  1  
Mon 28 Jul, 2014 05:56 pm
@SadTiger,
SadTiger wrote:
Am I suppossed to wear a sandwich board that that sez "I have gynecomastia"?


No.

___


That doesn't answer my question.

Quote:
do you tell your partners about the condition before they see you without a shirt for the first time?
ehBeth
 
  2  
Mon 28 Jul, 2014 05:58 pm
@SadTiger,
SadTiger wrote:
The insurance says it's not life threatening. Won't cover it. I've tried many times to make it happen. It's not like I haven't been living with this forever.


Does your insurance only cover life-threatening conditions? that would be unusual, even in the US.

Did you look into the suggestion Jespah made about a referral?
0 Replies
 
SadTiger
 
  1  
Mon 28 Jul, 2014 06:46 pm
@ehBeth,
Quote:
do you tell your partners about the condition before they see you without a shirt for the first time?


Some. Yes. One in particular I told before we started dating. She said it didn't matter to her, but her face when she saw said otherwise. She'd jiggle my chest and laugh later on in the relationship too. And I was in love with her. She was very cruel to me. Broke my heart in a way that I didn't think people could be so cruel as to do. Lying. Manipulation. The aformentioned teasing. Passive agressive stuff. Heartless woman
Germlat
 
  1  
Mon 28 Jul, 2014 06:53 pm
@SadTiger,
Quit blaming your problems on women. People are attracted to whatever the standard is today. Try being a woman. You're supposed to be ultra-thin, beautiful and young forever. Still, people see beyond that. In my opinion female or male, despite looks...some have extremely attractive personalities.
roger
 
  2  
Mon 28 Jul, 2014 07:08 pm
@Germlat,
Oh, try being Chinese for a while. You have to be stupid and clever - both at the same time.
ehBeth
 
  2  
Mon 28 Jul, 2014 07:09 pm
@SadTiger,
SadTiger wrote:
Heartless woman


She sounds awful.

Luckily not all people (male/female) are like that.
0 Replies
 
Germlat
 
  0  
Mon 28 Jul, 2014 07:16 pm
@roger,
Wow...I totally get it actually. Being too clever not good....not too clever bad. What a conundrum.
0 Replies
 
Romeo Fabulini
 
  1  
Tue 29 Jul, 2014 08:12 am
Quote:
Sadtiger said re surgery: I could never afford it! If i spend money on it i won't have money for rent or groceries, or gas, ect.

First get a solid quote for how much it'd cost, then plan around that figure.
I once wanted a super-duper radio-control outfit for model planes so I started saving up for it. It took me a whole year but I got it in the end..Smile
0 Replies
 
 

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