What did you want to be when you grew up?

Danger??

Didn't want no part of that! I wanted to be an electrician to get rich. My uncle told me that electricty was where the joules were. *rimshot*

When I was little I wanted to be Dr. J.



I used to shoot baskets in my driveway and pretend to be him. My parents were both short, so I used to try to make myself grow taller by thinking about it all the time. I thought I could will myself to become tall, even though all the odds were against me. I'd tell myself over and over again, "I will be tall, I will be tall, I will be tall..." so that one day I could play in the NBA.

I know, I know, you're wondering, "well, Kicky, did you ever become Dr. J?"

Sadly, no, I never became Dr. J., although I still do play basketball from time to time. I'm not bad either. The main obstacle to my goal was that I only ended up growing to be 5'8."

BUT that is over three inches taller than my father, who is the tallest person in my family. I think that mind over matter stuff worked!

I wanted to copyedit marketing materials and PowerPoint presentations for a financial risk management consultancy.

Wait, no, no...that's sadly what actually happened.

I am NEVER telling my kids to chase dreams.

So you're 5'8", your dad is 5' 5", that would make your mom 5' 0", maybe 4' 11", right?

<stomps feet, pulls hair, holds breath until she turns blue>

HOW LONG DO I HAFTA WAIT 'TIL YOU PEOPLE STOP ASKING ME WHAT I WANNA BE???

I don't know, alright!?!?! I have never known! I may never decide.







(Don't you know that's how people end up in p.r.?)

I wanted to be a beautician or a doctor....

I wanted to be a tree doctor, but could never find a stethescope that was long enough.

an archaeologist -- getting paid to play in the dirt

Now I have cats and I get to go on a dig every night

Hey, I wanted to be Dr. J, too.

Just for the fro, though. Sweet.

At first, I wanted to be a cowboy. I watched cowboy movies infinitum and even saw my favorite, Hopalong Cassidy, in person.

Next, it was paleo anthropology.

Then, a writer of fiction.

But, I decided it was much sweeter to be a G-D- maintenance man. He he.

Later, and pretty much in this order, were mercenary, test pilot, marine biologist, rock and roll star, trophy husband.






I think I may have landed something approximating the last item.

Kicky, a friend of mine is 5'6, maybe 5'7, and he's the tallest in his family, next tallest is at least a couple inches shorter. The family portrait is pretty funny.

I decided in 7th grade that I wanted to be a teacher like Mary McCrackin (author of Lovey and a couple of other books about her work) and work with autistic kids.

Before that I wanted to be Dolly Parton and appear on the Johnny Carson Show. I practiced for hours with my sister and we worked up dances and everything for "Two Doors Down" and Here You Come Again." I still know the moves. I still have the boobs. I never made it to Carson... In case you were wondering.

You wanted to be Dolly Parton?

I love her.....


I wanted to be Laura Petrie

Retired with lots of money.

I wanted to be a photographer. An astronaut photographer to be exact.

I got my first camera when I was 7, a Poloroid Swinger (still have it) shortly followed by a Minox 8mm (very James Bond -- I still have that too) but I already had some 35mm darkroom experience by that time so I knew I was being swindled.

When I was 8 my parents woke me up in the middle of the night to watch those brave fellows walk on the moon.

Then I found out that astronauts had to be military sorts and couldn't smoke pot and stuff (I was a bit older at this point) so I ditched the astronaut part of things and paid my way through photography school by go-go dancing.

I can think of some recent examples where pot would have been beneficial to austronauts.

proctologist... but I became a musician and dj so I could see more ass holes....

Hey boomerang, you have to throw some pictures up of you go-go dancing. You can't just state something like that without supporting evidence.

I wanted to be an auctioneer.