The MEGO Effect

All discussions in attorneys' and accountants' offices make MEGO.

It's not that I can't understand it...it's that I don't want to.

Eva, I can understand your brain shutting down when you don't want to be where you are and hear what you're hearing.

I've developed a dislike of math over the years. But I think it's a result of my not being good at it. Not the other way around. As for computers, there are things I really want to be able to do. I listen carefully (I think), I print out instructions so that I can follow along. And I can't do it. Something in my head just doesn't compute, so to speak.

I get like that when I get performance anxiety and fear being shamed by being too dumb to "get" something, or am already experiencing shame because I am not getting it immediately.

Shame is an emotion that shuts down normal processing.


A perfect example of this was when Craven tried to teach me how to post an image here.....I totally froze up, and it took me ages to try again, which I did quietly by myself.

I tried to do the image thing quietly by myself. After try 7,963 I had to say something.

Interesting that you feel shame or performance anxiety about not "getting" something. I usually just get frustrated and mad. Why don't I understand this!!! Grrrrrrr.

I just finished editing a book that had a small section of math calculations. Got out my handy dandy caclulator. One section made no sense to me. I checked it and rechecked it. Got annoyed. Then angry. Then wrote a note to the editor to check the one number I couldn't figure out.

I wonder if this is how people who aren't too bright experience the world. Things just don't get processed in their heads.

Oh God.
I'll come over and do your taxes for free if someone would come over and put stuff together for me.

I have a really difficult time with anything spatial. It's really embarrassing.

Let's say for example you ask me to open up a drawer and pull out a screwdriver, or a hole punch. I'll open the drawer and stare for a few seconds, not even thinking about what I want to get. Then a little voice will say "you're looking for something."

"Something! Yes, that's it. I'm looking for something! Ok, what was it I'm looking for"?
Then I'll look up for a second and think….finally I think "A screwdriver" I'll look back in the drawer for a few more seconds saying silently "screwdriver, screwdriver" I'm not looking for it yet, so far I'm just saying the word screwdriver.

Next I'll realize I've been staring in the drawer for quite some time, and I'll realize "oh, I've got to find a screwdriver. Now, what does a screwdriver look like?"

Now, I'm getting warmed up to the task. "OK, I know what a screwdriver looks like, but I'll never find it if I just keep looking at the stuff in the drawer." Ah…that a key for me, because it's then I remember that when I look in a drawer, or in a box or something, all I see is one entity, a singular thing called "stuff"

Finally, I look deeply, and glean there are various items making up this stuff, and I'll start to work from one end to the other, looking at each one, thinking "thimble, stapler, coins, knife (is a knife a screwdriver? No,….wait….no it's not. Well it's kinda like it, maybe I could….no….keep looking for the screwdriver, that's a knife…ok) thread, ruler, screwdriver, candle, staple puller….wait! Screwdriver! I found it!"

I've ended up in a crying fit because of the TV remote.

"SOB - I just wanted to watch a movie"!



I also have a hard time ordering pizza.

Why does ordering a pizza have to be so difficult?

You've got yourself a deal, kid. I love putting stuff together. Positively love it. I once ordered a file cabinet. It arrived in flat box. I was happy as a clam putting that sucker together.

But taxes!!!

I shudder. I cringe. I shake. I'm afraid to sign the returns. I'm signing this and I have no idea what's in it. I melt into a puddle of goo.

Can't speak to the pizza delivery. Don't know what to say, except that if you're ordering, I'd like mushrooms on top.

Sports...especially golf...

Contracts and small print -- real estate transactions, banking forms, insurance forms are the worst.

I am battling a hand held scanner at work -- anybody in retail knows how one of these things work. I've picked up 3 months temporary employment for some quick bucks and figure it will take me all of that time to figure out how the damn thing works (or that I need bifocals...sigh...)

Tai Chi, I can do (or used to be able to) some sports. But, and this is embarrassing, I can't do seatbelts.

Seatbelts. People have to hook me up like a baby. Some friends drove me home the other night. Ten blocks before we got to my building, I started to try to undo the damned belt. Nine, eight, seven, six blocks. I'm still locked in. Five, four, three, two. Finally got it--with guidance, words of encouragement, and directions.

That's ok Roberta, I couldn't tie my shoes until I was like 12 years old.

back to the spatial thing, I'd watch and watch how to do it, and it just made no sense.

Changing for gym was a nightmare.

Laughing with you, Roberta. Seat belts are indeed a challenge for me too. And Chai, gym was my worst subject in school; with any luck I was getting the volleyball over the net just when it was time to try basketball. My school didn't mark for effort or attitude; I came close to failing phys. ed. (Only my near perfect scores in the Sex Ed. portion kept me afloat . )

Roberta and Tai Chi, we are truly sisters under the skin.

Re: gym…it wasn't that I minded it so much, I liked the running around in circles, and doing jumping jacks and tumbling all right. It was the farging team sports. They say there's no "I" in team, well, there's no chai tea in it either.

Oh god, basketball. I don't even know the rules, and couldn't care less. Same for football and all that. I went to a Cat'lik school, and basket ball was HUGE.

Apparently every other cat'lik kid is born with the knowledge of how to play the game. All this stupid running back and forth, for no good reason I could see. The worst was when someone would throw the ball at me. What the hell do you think I'm going to do with this ball? I would just randomly throw it to someone else .

Chai,

Now you know why I like t'ai chi. I take classes but it can definitely be a solitary pursuit. (Although if you practise in public and wave a wooden sword around it'll certainly draw a crowd...and maybe the cops...)

I experience this effect just as soon as someone starts talking about cats . . .

Cats, pussies, moggies, grimalkins, toms, queens, kittens, puddy tats, pusses, cats, pussies, moggies, grimalkins, toms, queens, kittens, puddy tats, pusses, cats, pussies, moggies, grimalkins, toms, queens, kittens, puddy tats, pusses, cats, pussies, moggies, grimalkins, toms, queens, kittens, puddy tats, pusses, cats, pussies, moggies, grimalkins, toms, queens, kittens, puddy tats, pusses, cats, pussies, moggies, grimalkins, toms, queens, kittens, puddy tats, pusses, cats, pussies, moggies, grimalkins, toms, queens, kittens, puddy tats, pusses, cats, pussies, moggies, grimalkins, toms, queens, kittens, puddy tats, pusses, cats, pussies, moggies, grimalkins, toms, queens, kittens, puddy tats, pusses, cats, pussies, moggies, grimalkins, toms, queens, kittens, puddy tats, pusses, cats, pussies, moggies, grimalkins, toms, queens, kittens, puddy tats, pusses, cats, pussies, moggies, grimalkins, toms, queens, kittens, puddy tats, pusses, cats, pussies, moggies, grimalkins, toms, queens, kittens, puddy tats, pusses, cats, pussies, moggies, grimalkins, toms, queens, kittens, puddy tats, pusses, cats, pussies, moggies, grimalkins, toms, queens, kittens, puddy tats, pusses, cats, pussies, moggies, grimalkins, toms, queens, kittens, puddy tats, pusses, cats, pussies, moggies, grimalkins, toms, queens, kittens, puddy tats, pusses, cats, pussies, moggies, grimalkins, toms, queens, kittens, puddy tats, pusses, cats, pussies, moggies, grimalkins, toms, queens, kittens, puddy tats, pusses, cats, pussies, moggies, grimalkins, toms, queens, kittens, puddy tats, pusses,

MEGO when I'm subjected to the architectural history of such-and-such a street corner. These archaeological ramblings are particularly glaze-making when I'm trying to get directions from Point A to Point B in the here and now and my Source of Information insists on telling me that before there was a gas station there was a Dunkin' Doughnuts and before that there was a Victorian House that had been subdivided into apartments and before that...

My mind boggles.

Basketball!! Frozen to the court like a popsicle.

Noddy, If I run into you on the street and you ask me for directions, I'll remember to just point.

Some people make my eyes glaze over. A speech pattern. A tone of voice. Something happens. I can feel it happen. I shut down. I can feel dem green peepers glazing over while the person is talking. I force myself to pay attention. Sometimes I succeed and sometimes I don't.

Set, You don't wanna hear about pussycats? Okey dokey. (Meow)

Almost any book by James Joyce. MEGO sleep.

ever watch golf? MEEEEEEEGO