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I just opened my Christmas present

 
 
Reply Sun 24 Dec, 2006 06:18 pm
I only received one gift this year. There was a large box on my front step this morning when I went out to milk the goats. I brought the package inside and set it on the kitchen table, then went out to attend to the goats.

When I got back to the kitchen I examined the package. Fairly large, well wrapped, and a very nice red ribbon adorning the top. There was a tag that said "To: Gustav"

On the part of the tag that said "From:" there was nothing.

I shook the package. It was very light and deep inside the bowels of the gift I could hear a distant rattling noise.

What was it? Who was it from?

With trembling hands I tore the paper and discovered a plain white cardboard box. I lifted the lid on the box and peered inside. At first I thought there was nothing but then I remembered the rattling noise and began to scan the bottom more carefully.

And then I saw it. An almond. It had rolled into the corner when I opened the gift and remained almost invisible against the brown cardboard background.

I picked the almond up with my index finger and thumb, held it to the light, and examined it carefully.

A fine-looking almond with a rich texture and an impressive shape.

I popped it into my mouth and chewed slowly, savoring the taste, then swallowed the pulp.

Most satisfying.

What did you get for Christmas?
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Type: Discussion • Score: 1 • Views: 655 • Replies: 18
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martybarker
 
  1  
Reply Sun 24 Dec, 2006 06:22 pm
I bet it was from the lady with the eggs!
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CalamityJane
 
  1  
Reply Sun 24 Dec, 2006 06:39 pm
Shouldn't presents only be opened tomorrow morning?
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gustavratzenhofer
 
  1  
Reply Sun 24 Dec, 2006 06:54 pm
CalamityJane wrote:
Shouldn't presents only be opened tomorrow morning?


Only Germans exhibit such crude behavior.
0 Replies
 
CalamityJane
 
  1  
Reply Sun 24 Dec, 2006 07:06 pm
No, as in Germany gifts are exchanged on the eve of the 24th,
and in the US (so I thought) on the 25th.

However, it seems natural that guys like you have no patience
and would rip open a gift immediately upon receipt.
0 Replies
 
gustavratzenhofer
 
  1  
Reply Sun 24 Dec, 2006 07:08 pm
Was this gift from you, Jane? The almond?

It was beautiful. Thank you.
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CalamityJane
 
  1  
Reply Sun 24 Dec, 2006 07:09 pm
No, I am afraid not, gustav!

I would have given you a copy of my diary which is called
"Welcome to America".
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gustavratzenhofer
 
  1  
Reply Sun 24 Dec, 2006 07:11 pm
That would be some interesting reading. Tell me about chapter four, where you were forced to sell yourself on the streets of Kansas City to earn enough money to buy your way to San Diego.

I loved that story. You're a brave and determined woman, Jane.
0 Replies
 
CalamityJane
 
  1  
Reply Sun 24 Dec, 2006 07:15 pm
Actually, that was Gallup, NM and not Kansas City. And the Indians
were quite nice to me, once I showed them how a corn distillery works.
0 Replies
 
Bi-Polar Bear
 
  1  
Reply Mon 25 Dec, 2006 11:55 am
I have been to Kansas City and I have seen Calamity Janes' avatar. With all those lovely teeth, she would be considered too much of an oddity in KC. No one would purchase her.
0 Replies
 
Walter Hinteler
 
  1  
Reply Mon 25 Dec, 2006 11:58 am
I've been to Gallup, I saw CJ and ...
0 Replies
 
Walter Hinteler
 
  1  
Reply Mon 25 Dec, 2006 11:59 am
Actually, I even bought some presents in Gallup. Laughing
0 Replies
 
JLNobody
 
  1  
Reply Mon 25 Dec, 2006 12:00 pm
Yeah, but what a great rental.
0 Replies
 
martybarker
 
  1  
Reply Mon 25 Dec, 2006 12:30 pm
Gus,
Maybe someone is trying to send you a message. You know, like getting a fish wrapped in newspaper. Have you pissed anyone off lately???
0 Replies
 
Roberta
 
  1  
Reply Mon 25 Dec, 2006 12:53 pm
Hiya Gus, Heard from Lord Ellpus lately?

http://www.able2know.com/forums/viewtopic.php?p=2450515#2450515
0 Replies
 
CalamityJane
 
  1  
Reply Mon 25 Dec, 2006 01:08 pm
Walter Hinteler wrote:
I've been to Gallup, I saw CJ and ...



.....and?
0 Replies
 
Walter Hinteler
 
  1  
Reply Mon 25 Dec, 2006 01:15 pm
And? Scheene Weihnacht'n und a guat's nei's Johr!
0 Replies
 
jespah
 
  1  
Reply Tue 26 Dec, 2006 04:34 am
Gus, I'm ashamed at you, for turning up your nose at the thoughtful and loving gift of antioxidants this holiday season. As for CJ, well, perhaps there are long-term leasing arrangements?
0 Replies
 
Stray Cat
 
  1  
Reply Wed 27 Dec, 2006 06:03 pm
Are you sure it wasn't a lump of coal, Gus?
0 Replies
 
 

 
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