margo wrote:well, c'mon, Nimh, 'fess up! What have you done?
Sorry, I was distracted last night, was posting in some old music threads I dug up instead of taking care of my own thread - in
Train Songs and
Banned songs. It was cool. Check it out
.
Me, extravaganzas ...
I'm afraid I've been in survival mode for too long now, I haven't much been able yet to go beyond coping from day to day into where you can open up yourself some new pleasurable horizon.
I mean, sure, I make sure to take care of myself, still, too, I have my Walter moments (with his chocolates <smiles>) - I spoil myself sometimes, I love cake, I love going to a fancy place and treating myself to something special - but that's just
nice, no longer extravagant.
It's kind of hard. It will come back, I'm sure. I've come to at least
think about what I like doing in life, myself, again, about what I might like to do - I can see the possibility of it again, that's a good first step, isn't it?
Of from before, I miss the clubbing, the staying out, dancing till into the next morning, for one - miss the E high, too - the day of mindblasting sex that would follow ... <big grin>. And travelling, oh - now I still get to a few places, thanks to my job mostly, but we don't have the money to ever go on holidays ourselves, like - and I used to arrange
cool trips - like, for Anastasia's birthday before she came here, we stayed in
the Esterhazy Palace in Fertod, "the Hungarian Versailles", it was so beautiful a place - and just planning it (because it's actually really cheap, but they only speak Hungarian where you make the reservations, so it's not easy) - like, the effort, the planning, the looking forward to it, all that?
In better days again ... I'm sure .... <smiles>