Creating Community With Chronic Illness

For some prerequisite context, I’m a neurodivergent individual (both diagnosed with autism and ADHD to be exact) and I’ve been a known type one diabetic for over 7 years. In May, after about 9 months of progressively worsening joint discomfort, musculoskeletal issues, long lasting deepening fatigue and the iconic butterfly rash upon my face I got diagnosed with lupus. I’m still on a couple of waiting lists for other doctors and specialities outside of rheumatology to see if anything else is wrong, but that’s what is known at this moment in time. With all that being said….

What are ways or steps toward making more proper community when it appears that you're not really in a "commonly serviced" medical-social check boxed niche? I've never really been an easily generalized person anyway, even before I started having more severe health struggles my general being and temperament seemed... controversial (?) to begin with, so it isn't like I'm unfamiliar with people not understanding things about my person. However, since I got my diagnosis of lupus it's been becoming slowly more clear that my irl friends/friends who live close by but frequently chat with on the internet are unsure and slightly unaware of why my limitations are they ways they are as well as why I was a lot more physically able last fall (slightly predating my illnesses striking in or about right at the very early start) and how I'm now this summer less active and more careful than before. To clarify, none of my friends have been rude or bluntly unfair to me about this, but it's something I have been picking up in the air when I come around the space. I can't fully blame this wondering because even though I have explained to the best of my ability my illness a solid 90% of my friends have no experience with chronic conditions and mostly are nearing the end of their high school careers or just graduated high school and looking ahead.

I've done a lot of research too in trying to find community irl through lupus or chronic pain support groups or social hours for those groups but I don't seem to be lucking out. The best I found was there's an in person group an hour way, but there sort of in the smack dab of the city near me (an hour out from where I live) so that does take preparation and effort to calculate train lines and walking time which is a lot of work for a group who only meets quarterly. The few other social groups near by are really more for caregivers or more intellectually disabled individuals just from reading descriptions and "About Our Community!" pages extensively which, again, I understand why and appreciate that they exist but that to me is not my territory.

I’m pretty social online already, that's actually where I get most of the little conversations I get outside of family, which is why I'm not jumping for joy immediately at Zoom or Google Meet groups. Not to disrespect those set ups, I understand and appreciate that they exist for people who like and benefit from those sorts of things, but I'm not fully up to the commitment of filling out forms or paperwork to then get a link to a virtual call where I'm not sure if I'll vibe with the community they set up because all I know is these people share a condition but not if they share my core views on the world or interests. So, with all this being said, has anyone else with similar conditions and symptomology figured out some other ways of creating or finds extra community and if so what and/or how did you do so? Thanks in advance for any answers