Are we incapable of talking about how we feel??

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I know this world has been violent since day one but it seems to be going completely loopy lately.

Over the weekend it was reported that 2 teenagers were stabbed to death 10 minutes away from where I live(a lovely sleepy old town)Apparently they were stabbed because they said bad things about the murderers divorced mother.

This morning I hear an ex security guy went into Harvey Nichols and shot his ex then himself!!!

What happened to talking about things?
When did we get to the point when talking no longer works and we have to walk around with guns and knives 'just incase they become handy'??!!

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I think TV, and Computers have some blame. Every day less , and less people have face to face conversations with each other.

So many things in this modern age that take us away from each other more than bring us together.

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I'm afraid that the "gangsta", "bling" and other such related crazes have made it almost compulsory for a fair proportion of our young to carry knives, and on rare occasions, guns.

The main priority in life for such devotees, is to be "respected" by those around them, and cannot handle any situations that involve them being "disrespected", in any way other than intimidation or violence.

Failure to stamp down on disrespecters will cause a massive loss of face with the rest of the crowd, and is a sign of weakness.

The conversation probably went:

"Are you disrespecting my mother?"

"well, what I said....."

"Are you disrespecting my family?"

"well, I...."

<repeat several more times, and then stab the "disrespecter">

I think the law should be tightened up regarding the carrying of knives.

No excuses or loopholes, as there is no need for a youth to be carrying a knife, unless he can prove beyond a shadow of a doubt, that he requires it for his working trade.

First offenders should have a shock sentence of a month or so, and second time offenders a lot longer. This needs to be stamped out immediately in Britain, before it becomes the acceptable norm.

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Its so strange that kids expect respect.
Personnaly I try to treat all people well unless they give me reason not to but Id never resort to violence.

Dont people have to earn respect, not demand it because the other person is to scared to not respect them because they have a knife.
How twisted is that.

it is a peir pressure thing to look cool infront of friends, such a shame it can result in deaths.Then the murderers dont have the guts to own up.
Surely it would be 'cool' to have a prison sentance while being young!!!

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material girl wrote:

Its so strange that kids expect respect.
Personnaly I try to treat all people well unless they give me reason not to but Id never resort to violence.

Dont people have to earn respect, not demand it because the other person is to scared to not respect them because they have a knife.
How twisted is that.

it is a peir pressure thing to look cool infront of friends, such a shame it can result in deaths.Then the murderers dont have the guts to own up.
Surely it would be 'cool' to have a prison sentance while being young!!!

Talking about respect. I have worked with young children, teens, in schools, churches, other teen programs. And, I have made some observations. Too many times it's the adults that don't respect teens, and children. I have seen school principals verbally put down students, and bad mouth their parents in the auditorium in front of everyone because the children are acting restless like kids. Too many times I have seen adults ignore, and criticize teens because of their age; when in fact most teens are smart, wise, and have surprised me with their understanding of the world around them. You are right you have to earn respect, and that goes for adults too.

When we become adults some of us forget when we were young. We forget we experienced insecurities, fears, confusions. It's part of growing up, why don't some adults respect our young people's growing pains.

Today more, and more families are becoming alienated from their young ones. Which reminds me of Charles Manson's prediction when he said that your children will grow up to kill you.

Money is the true God of America, and to some other countries. And to this God we would even sacrifice our children. See what is happening to the children of the world. And you want teens to respect adults, when they can see what we do to each other, and our planet. They are only following our example.

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Yeah, your right.Ive thought about it and it always comes back to the parents.

I was talking to a pal yesterday who moved her kid from different schools.She was being bullied and criticised because she said please and thank you, then she moved schools and the kids are so polite.Literally in the space of a mile kids can be completely different.

With the young 'chav' generation having kids the parents are kids themselves, they dont know how to handle kids because they havnt experienced enough life.
alot of the verbal abuse, id imagie, would come from resentment towards the child for messing up their lives.

Ive found myself being nasty to kids simply because I dont know the right thing to say or how to handle it properly.
I have tried to remember what its like to be young but when I hear a 10 year old girl crticising a 7 year old, eg like a jilted girlfriend would act towards the new girlfriend of her ex, it makes me angry and it shows.
Kids seem to be acting like adults hwereas adults are acting like kids!!

There is too much to say, Ive confused myself.

But your right, we need to treat kids well.

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material girl wrote:

Yeah, your right.Ive thought about it and it always comes back to the parents.

I was talking to a pal yesterday who moved her kid from different schools.She was being bullied and criticised because she said please and thank you, then she moved schools and the kids are so polite.Literally in the space of a mile kids can be completely different.

With the young 'chav' generation having kids the parents are kids themselves, they dont know how to handle kids because they havnt experienced enough life.
alot of the verbal abuse, id imagie, would come from resentment towards the child for messing up their lives.

Ive found myself being nasty to kids simply because I dont know the right thing to say or how to handle it properly.
I have tried to remember what its like to be young but when I hear a 10 year old girl crticising a 7 year old, eg like a jilted girlfriend would act towards the new girlfriend of her ex, it makes me angry and it shows.
Kids seem to be acting like adults hwereas adults are acting like kids!!

There is too much to say, Ive confused myself.

But your right, we need to treat kids well.

"Yeah, your right.Ive thought about it and it always comes back to the parents"

I did not say that. Yes, some parents are to blame, but we are all responsible. Our society, our governments, our values...It's the #1 cop out to always blame the parents. Those that only blame the parents are people that think they are better than anybody else. They refuse to see the bigger picture.

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From what Ive seen many kids copy their parents wether acting good or bad.They are the main influence.Then its kids influnce who have badly behaved parents.

If some people dont have any contact with kids how can we all be responsible?

What do you think the answer is?

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MG, we adults still, and always will copy each other. It's part of being human. A baby copies from his parents, thats the way it learns, and your right, sometimes it's something bad. But children also learn from their society, media, and government.

You really don't understand my point, but, thats ok, that too is part of being human.

If I had the answer, I would probably be rich. If I were rich, I would help more people. I would become a Mother Theresa , only I would still have sex, wear regular clothes, and not eat oatmeal all the time.

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Hmm, dont know about kids learning from media and government.Ive never known a kid to watch the news or read papers.
Society-The people that surround them, who are mainly kids or their own parents.
media-magazines/tv that focus on insecurities
government-most kids wouldnt be interested.

If we copy each other who is the first person to do the thing thats to be copied?
There must be something new from time to time.

Im not trying to understand your good point as Im too hungry to think sensibly, I just like a good disussion.

I shall stop waffling.

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material girl wrote:

Hmm, dont know about kids learning from media and government.Ive never known a kid to watch the news or read papers.
Society-The people that surround them, who are mainly kids or their own parents.
media-magazines/tv that focus on insecurities
government-most kids wouldnt be interested.

If we copy each other who is the first person to do the thing thats to be copied?
There must be something new from time to time.

Im not trying to understand your good point as Im too hungry to think sensibly, I just like a good disussion.

I shall stop waffling.

It's obvious that you don't know kids, teens or the world. It's ok to believe what you want. I'm not here to change anybodies way of thinking, I only give my opinions, and observations. Go ahead eat please, I don't want you fainting on your chair from hunger.

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Kids grow up today watching a lot of violence. Its on the news for a start.

They see that its alright for adults to attack and kill people, including children in another country.
They see that its alright to put a gun to a man's head and shoot him dead in an underground station and even if he's innocent....thats alright.
They are brought up on the propaganda of 'terrorism'

I read a while ago that an american youth murdered both his parents because they didn't bring him a snowcone home when they'd brought themselves one each.
In Britain, infant school children (aged between 5-7 years) who tied a kid to a tree and set fire to him.
No one to blame accept society - after all we are responsible for children.

Also, in the corporate world, avertising puts great pressure on kids. We see ten year olds dressed like Brittany Spears and then wonder why Britain has the second highest under-age pregnancy rate in the developed world - (after the US).

As an adult society, we are so greedy that we do not allow our children to be children.

Violence probably comes from fear and anger. So, why are our kids out there fearful and angry?
Easy.
They don't trust the adults around them. They don't feel safe in our world. Who can blame them? The adults they look up to are all about greed and power - about winning.
We forget that a child is sensitive and without prejudice until we fill their heads with lies and deceit.

Personally - I think that if we all threw our TVs away (I did about 7 years ago), we could do a lot to stop what is happening - the defiling of our kids.

As adults we have to take reponsibility at some point.

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Being the age I am now (20) and having just recently gotten out of high school and watching all the kids grow up... I don't think it is the tv as much as we think...

Many of the teenagers that I know don't even watch tv, they are always out on the go, making sure they don't miss anything...

I partially blame the parents... I see many kids go home to empties houses at the age of 10... many have no choice but to become responisble children, instead of going outside to play...

As for violence, the tv and video games may have some impact on that, but I also believe what we see on the streets impacts us alot... I mean when I first saw a person I knew carrying a knife, first thing I thought, well I better carry on too incase that person goes crazy and tries to stab me, then I can stab them back...

Nowadays these kids are sent to therapists and filled up with pills and said to be fixed... does anyone really listen to them?? And for those that do listen, is there anything they can really do?

I watch my ex's younger sister, who is 16... I watch her tell boys/men she is 18 or 19 and then I hear about how she slept with them... Then I look at her family life... father's gone, mother drinks and drinks and doesn't discpiline.... Look at how she is at school, she's dropped out, gone back, dropped out again, and is going back again... she is a bright girl yet she is taking academic classes.. I am taking about the 2+2=4 sh*t... I have seen her homework, which just sits in her room and collects dust....

She acts out in school to uphold her reputation, thinking if she acts tough then nobody will really see that she is a sad, lonely girl, screaming for attention and help but it is too late to help her because she is slowly killing herself from the inside out...

I could go on and on.... but I am gonna stop for now!

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I can remember seeing a violent films when I was younger, for example the bit in Were Eagles dare when the soldier saves the little girl in the water wheel and he gets cut up!!
That scared the heck out of me, so did the Childcatcher in Chitty Chitty Bang Bang,neither things made me violent or unnecessarily rude.

The one child that I know doesnt watch the news or violent things on tv.

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I know kids that watch 18 certs at 10 years old on DVD
With internet access, sky, DVDs, video (and an empty house) how can we know what kids are being subjected to?
Not to mention capitalist media.

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ENDYMION wrote:

Kids grow up today watching a lot of violence. Its on the news for a start.

They see that its alright for adults to attack and kill people, including children in another country.
They see that its alright to put a gun to a man's head and shoot him dead in an underground station and even if he's innocent....thats alright.
They are brought up on the propaganda of 'terrorism'

I read a while ago that an american youth murdered both his parents because they didn't bring him a snowcone home when they'd brought themselves one each.
In Britain, infant school children (aged between 5-7 years) who tied a kid to a tree and set fire to him.
No one to blame accept society - after all we are responsible for children.

Also, in the corporate world, avertising puts great pressure on kids. We see ten year olds dressed like Brittany Spears and then wonder why Britain has the second highest under-age pregnancy rate in the developed world - (after the US).

As an adult society, we are so greedy that we do not allow our children to be children.

Violence probably comes from fear and anger. So, why are our kids out there fearful and angry?
Easy.
They don't trust the adults around them. They don't feel safe in our world. Who can blame them? The adults they look up to are all about greed and power - about winning.
We forget that a child is sensitive and without prejudice until we fill their heads with lies and deceit.

Personally - I think that if we all threw our TVs away (I did about 7 years ago), we could do a lot to stop what is happening - the defiling of our kids.

As adults we have to take reponsibility at some point.

Your right, sad but true.

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