Adjusting to getting married still

If you both work, devise a way to pool money and share expenses. Figure out your basic monthly budget and each contribute to a joint household checking account. Your contributions should be proportionate to your individual income, so one of you may end up contributing more than the other. What's left over can be deposited in two personal accounts for your individual use. Life is too short to argue about money.

I think one thing people don't realize getting married (full disclosure: I'm married to another member of this site, and we'll be celebrating 33 years married in 2 days ) is that one thing that comes with it is living together.

It's more than sharing a bed. It's also (in no particular order, and by 'you', I mean both of you):

• The thermostat. 'Nuff said.
  
• How much you save and how much you spend and how much you invest. Speaking of this, I hope you knew how much debt you were each in (if any) before the wedding.
  
• Your vacationing style. Relax at the beach? Visit every museum in the area? Work during time off? Something else? Cruise or flying? Driving everywhere?
  
• Your levels of cleanliness. Do you leave dishes in the sink to soak overnight? Do you vacuum every week religiously? Do you separate your laundry? Do you leave the seat up?
  
• Your degrees of tolerance to noise. How loud is the TV on? How about music?
  
• Your cost-cutting measures. Do you turn off the lights when you leave a room? Do you fill the car with premium? Do you brown bag your lunch, ever, if you work outside the home?
  
• Behavior around pets, if applicable. Do they sleep in your bed? How often are they bathed, if applicable? Who feeds them? If applicable, who walks them?
  
• Disciplinary styles if you have or want children, including children from previous relationships, adopted, or children you may become guardian(s) for. Strict or relaxed? Do you spank? Do you admit to children when you're wrong? Do you tell them about major things happening, such as a serious illness, a grandparent's death, or your salary? How much of a say do they have in terms of decorating their room, choosing classes, etc., as they age? Don't forget that disabled children, mentally ill children, kids on the autism spectrum, etc. bring more challenges. How would each of you handle it if any of your children came out as gay? Or trans?
  
• Your plans for the future. Do you agree on how much you need to save? Do either of you run up big bills, or gamble? Do either of you need to build credit?
  
• Your attitudes toward work. Do either of you work overtime regularly? Work two or more jobs? Travel for work? How do either of you feel about relocating, if that becomes necessary?
  
• Your families and relationships with them. You mentioned cultural issues. Do these affect how inlaws behave with either of you, or their expectations about whether you'll have children, expect them to babysit or the like? Are you no-contact with any family members?

I realize these are a lot, but you don't have to answer any of these questions here.

Just consider them as you think about your marriage. Maybe it's time for you and your spouse to sit down and calmly, rationally, talk about some of these issues.

All the best to you. I wish you a long, happy, and fulfilling marriage.

Where did you read that they have money problems?
If so, I would not pool money, there are other ways to share cost.
One could pay the rent/mortgage, the other pays for living expenses.
Household chores need to be shared.

Can you give an example what brought you into the dog house?

I didn't, as she provided minimal information. Just wanted to help them avoid that situation. Your method is fine – the important thing is to have a plan and be open about finances. It's usually listed as one of the main problems facing newlyweds. And yes, sharing household chores is another big one.