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My (22f) boyfriend (26m) admitted that he tells his parents when we have sex, feeling violated

 
 
Reply Thu 15 Jun, 2023 11:17 am

My boyfriends parents live abroad and he has told me they know everything about him. Recently , he told me a couple of things that made me very uncomfortable.

He told me, that sometimes if he happens to be on the phone with his parents after we've been intimate, he let's them know we've been intimate. He told me that since he's been a virgin for so long, in a way his parents are monitoring him/ he is updating them on his sexual progress. We both have some issues down there. He has told me his is willing to speak to his mother, who is a nurse, about my private issues down there and get her advice.

I'm abroad right now, but I have told him how uncomfortable this has made me feel. He told me he would like to speak when we are in person, to explain both our perspectives and answer any questions I have.

I feel that uncomfortable that I'm honestly reconsidering the relationship. I wonder what else he's told them:( How would you guys react/ what's the best thing to do about this? He's great apart from this, just wanting to know others perspective and see if I'm overreacting. I just want this sexual topic to be kept private between us. Thanks all.
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Type: Question • Score: 5 • Views: 485 • Replies: 9
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Orangerose91
 
  -1  
Reply Thu 15 Jun, 2023 11:39 am
@Orangerose91,
Think I may have posted this in the wrong section 😅
roger
 
  2  
Reply Thu 15 Jun, 2023 12:25 pm
@Orangerose91,
One section is as good as any other.

I share your 'discomfort'. If a woman was sharing such about her and I, I would probably dump her, and not even bother to tell her why. You have to make your own decision, but that is what I would likely do in your place.
0 Replies
 
Mame
 
  2  
Reply Thu 15 Jun, 2023 01:43 pm
@Orangerose91,
That is creepy weird. I'd drop him like a hot potato and make sure my next beau is more mature.
0 Replies
 
Ragman
 
  2  
Reply Fri 16 Jun, 2023 08:14 am
@Orangerose91,
If you are 32, as indicated by your screen name, this sheds a different light on this.

Wait, I take that back. No matter what age, this type of parental ‘supervision’ is not acceptable behavior in an adult relationship. Perhaps it’s time to move on to greener pastures and other more mature partners.
0 Replies
 
bobsal u1553115
 
  2  
Reply Fri 16 Jun, 2023 09:39 am
This is not good. In my mind this is a breach of trust that he is very casual about. It would definitely cause me to re-evaluate the relationship. Do you believe your sex life is suitable fodder for the discussion of others?

A terrible breach of trust.
Mame
 
  2  
Reply Fri 16 Jun, 2023 02:20 pm
@bobsal u1553115,
It's not just 'others' - it's his bloody parents. I can't imagine anyone wanting to know or wanting to share, especially between the generations. Gross!
bobsal u1553115
 
  1  
Reply Fri 16 Jun, 2023 06:10 pm
@Mame,
I sure don't think it ends with mom and dad.
0 Replies
 
Orangerose91
 
  2  
Reply Sat 17 Jun, 2023 01:05 am
@Orangerose91,
Thanks all, I’ve since made the decision to break up
bobsal u1553115
 
  1  
Reply Sat 17 Jun, 2023 05:52 am
@Orangerose91,
A wise choice. Please keep us up to date or if you need a talking down. Your feelings and values have worth.
0 Replies
 
 

 
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