Need help decoding an eerie nightmare.

Reply Sat 11 Mar, 2023 11:53 pm
Ok I'm a 34 year old trans female, and have been hospitalized for the last 9 months. I am a firm believer in God at more of a spiritual Christian level. I've help others with in my community find some kind of piece of mind through the love of the higher power. I've had an extremely hard life and have dealt with abandonment, lose of all my blood line relatives, a victim of hate crimes and still have had the ability to have faith and believe I'm here for a purpose. A couple of nights ago I had a fairly vivid dream that caused me physical and psychological pain. I was in this theater or old cathedral with high vaulted sealing and there was a group of us on a upper level of seating in the huge auditorium. It felt like it was an audition of some sorts. I go to a seat where I had my belongings which seemed to be missing and this is were lines get blurred for me all of a sudden I start to have this heated arguement with a slender dark hair woman. I remember having this strong hatred feeling mixed with some kind of I'm right, I know I am sense aimed towards her. All of a sudden I'm chasing this woman with urges to hurt here because I feel she took what belong to me and was holding me back because she took it. Like she stole the light from me. Ask I chase here to the end of this corridor there's a open like an old windowesque kind of opening that light is shining in from. She doesn't slow down and jumps out of it. I go to this window like portal and look out to find a venetian like city with close buildings and water canals separating them. Wondering where she went I look around, then down and there she was hanging feet inder me hold a bag draped around her back and with the other hand hold on to a metal plant hanger fixed to the side of the building. She then drives into the waters of the canal and I dive right in after her. Swimming trying to catch her. I resurface in a dark room that had others and I was snatched up by some random men that bound me to this chair chest to the back of seat ands bound to arms protruding backwards. There were others similarly bound in other areas of the room. I hear scream and yelling and see bloody bodies being drug out that had no life left. Then I started to feel it as they cut into the skin of my back to push these metal disc like objects into the areas cut open about six of them. These discs had. Wires connected to them all I remember is the feeling of electricity surge through my lower back as they connected the wires to running from disc to disc. At this time I'm in gut wrenching pain screaming for them to stop. They did but I was still feeling the electric currents zapping me until this heavier set black woman came to my back to reassign the wires. I felt a calming with hear around a feeling of compassion. The pain was subsiding but still there. I heard in a whisper secretive like voice stating, "your stronger than the rest, that's why you were chosen." Then I was awaken by my nurse at the hospital that came on to the night shift someone I'm very fond of and I was alittle confused and felt it was real then out of nowhere I started tearing up like she had done something to me. She was then concerned because she had never seen me like this. I'm been going through experimental treatments and chemo for the last 4 months. I don't really ever have any dreams let alone nightmares or something like this. The last time I could remember dreaming vivids was in my early teen year's. I fall back to sleep to start over in that room and then blank the rest of my sleep. Does anyone have any kind of interpretation or idea to what this dream could mean or does it mean nothing just a wild delusion? Please let me know.
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Reply Sun 12 Mar, 2023 04:37 am
You need to write in paragraphs, a huge block of text like this is intimidating.

I know what crap you go through, I live with my trans son and he keeps me in the loop. He's told me all about the nasty stuff directed at non binary creator Jeffrey Marsh, and it's a bloody disgrace. They have done nothing wrong at all.

I must confess I only read the first few sentences because of the lack of paragraphing, it hurts my eyes.

However, as far as dreams go there's two ways of looking at them. Mostly it's just your brain dealing with stuff that happened, and the emnity of a thin woman sounds like a lot of TERFs.

I do have a book on dream interpretation and if you can transcribe your dream in a way I can read without hurting my eyes I'll try to help.

It is very general though and may not be too much help.

You take care and don't let the haters grind you down.
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