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Wed 14 Jul, 2021 12:15 pm
My husband has always been someone who drinks out of the house with friends. He's always refused to drink in the house as he says he hates it. Im pregnant now, and he has begun drinking in the house occasionally. Also going out with his friend once a week for a few beers and when I was away with friends had his friend over to drink in our home with him (the thing he would never do with me) even though its our home together.
The thing that upsets me is we have a small child already, and have little time to go out so having a date night and a drink and chat at home would have been good for us as a couple. He always refused this.
I asked him why the sudden change in behaviour and he just says he doesn't know, but I know all behavior has a cause. I'm worried when I eventually can drink again he will reserve this only for when he is out as before (which isn't us together) and we carry on our night routine of watching 5 hours of TV together.
I'm also confused as to why he has always said he hates drinking at home, but when im removed from the situation he likes it and stays up until 1am with his friend. It seems I'm the problem but if that's the case he isn't telling me. Im confused.
The problem is not you —— it’s his problem with alcohol. He’s putting his alcohol use before for you and your family. He has all the signs of being an alcoholic. Believe me I know.
My first husband acted exactly like this man is acting. He would sit at the bar for hours and hours. I thought things would change if he came home but he even drank there. Then when his best friend got a divorce and moved out of town he even continued his old habits.
I encourage you to go to Al-Anon. It’s a support group for people who are living with others who have an alcohol problem.
@Sarpur19,
I doubt your pregnancy has anything to do with it.
If you don't like what's going on and he won't talk about it or change his behaviour, then you need to take action for yourself.
Would you like to see your children in this situation? What would you advise them?
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