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Mon 23 Nov, 2020 01:09 pm
So my mom has given me the privilege to be a stay at home mom to my 2 girls, getting dropped and picked up from school, being able to attend any event, not have my youngest in daycare during these times, and while she’s having to live 6 hours away for take care of her sick mom, live at home with them and take care of the hiuse and everything in here, in return she makes sure the bills our paid, and we have what we need, my oldest is 7, and my younger just turned 1, I haven’t worked since a little before I got pregnant with my 1 year old last year, before my mom even had to move, because she didn’t want her to be in daycare so little or period with daycares these days, with that being said, I’m very thankful and very blessed, but I am not lazy or incompetent to work a job, or don’t enjoy have more of my own money, I coupon religiously like it’s a career and honestly it saves her so much money on a lot, so it’s not like I’m not contributing where I can, I just recently filed for food stamps since my mom has had to move, and for that, the government went after both of the dads for child support, the oldest father hasn’t ever paid at all in 7 years, and the youngest paid me a little off papers for a little bit, but it’s not like I went and did it to be spiteful or anything like that, either way, it’s been long over due. My oldest only has her on weekends and I have her the week. But the youngest doesn’t have a real norm work schedule so it’s just whenever he asks for her, which is a lot he has a super consistent relationship with her, but when he gets a real job with an actual schedule again, it’s going to go back to me having her majority of the time, and even still, this is her main home. He is saying that I don’t deserve child support, j need to go get a job, he’s supporting her for us both, just the most, he has never been asked to buy her anything on this end, nothing, and he’s asked plenty of times for items for her when he takes her, doesn’t ever return anything or it gets ruined, but the main point is, I feel like if my kids have a roof over there head, plenty to eat, a car to get use places, a yard to place in, toys, clean house, beds and bedrooms of their own, hot water, nice clothes, and are taken care of on my end, none of that needing to come from them, why should it matter? How is that him supporting her for us both? On nights he does keep her, he drops her off to ME, so he can work, My oldest is out of zone for school because she’s in an all A school I enrolled her in, so busses don’t travel her for her, so I take and pick her up everyday, while her dad as well, dowsn have to worry about that. Whenever they have something to do, or need to do, or want to do, where do they bring the girls no questions asked? They can work and do whatever they want, but for me to go back to work, I’d have to find transportation for my oldest to and from, if not one or the other, and a daycare of baby sitter for My baby which costs so much money, I’m not asking for a pat on the back or reward for being a stay at home mom to them, but you’d think their dads would be thankful that at NO cost to them at all, all that is taken care of by their mom at home instead of someone else, potty training, all that. Another argument he likes to try is the child support is meant for parents that aren’t in the child’s life, like I just don’t get it. My girls got everything they need all the time but I don’t see why I’m made to be such the bad guy for this, especially since I didn’t even file on them, but even still, so instead of always just being Taken care of, if they want something as simple as a happy meal or a toy they see in the store, and sometimes I don’t have it, that thanks to child support, I’m able to do that for their daughters. Just really sick of being o made out to be lazy and just not want to work, and that I sit on my butt all day and do nothing productive with and for my girls.
@BeeZeeAndMe,
It's not a question of whether you deserve it. It's a question of whether your kids have enough to eat and shoes on their feet.
The guy telling you that child support is for parents not in a child's life is full of ****.
Get a lawyer (you've probably got a legal services office or the equivalent there).
Sue the bastard(s) for child support.
It's not about gratitude. It's not about laziness. It's not about who deserves what.
It's about making sure your children don't starve.