GOODBYE LETTER ON FACEBOOK WALL

I wrote this letter on my friends facebook wall (Which means her friends could see it) I was so worried that this letter was going to be lost in her message requests and she would never see it and while I did not feel comfortable writng it on her wall I did it anyway because it was very important to me that she at least see it and I wrote nothing bad about her. Her response was to block me on that facebook (Which was okay because I was delting it and she let me know) and then on my new facebook that I am not friends with she did not block me but she did block messenger. I said hello to her at work that night so she ignored me So I am just leaving her alone. I also told her in the letter that I would never ask her at work if she read it So while I know she saw it I HAVE NO IDEA IF SHE READ IT, Anyway here is the letter minus names. Honestly I do no t believe that she will ever talk to me again and maybe that is for the best but if she ever does what do I do. All I know is I am going to give her space ane leave her alone BUT I DO NOT REGRET the letter itself I wanted her to know these things Here is the letter FRIEND is substitute for her name... FRIEND THIS IS MY GOODBYE LETTER PLEASE TAKE THE TIME TO READ THE WHOLE LETTER WHEN EVER YOU HAVE THE TIME BECAUSE THIS IS THE LAST LETTER AND I NEED TO SAY A LOT I am NOT saying goodbye to our friendship BUT I AM saying goodbye to the past and moving on because I have been beating myself up for ruining our friendship but before I move on,There are some things I want you to know. 1. YOU HAVE BEEN VERY GRACIOUS and kind and forgiving and I appreciate that very much. 2. I MISS OUR FRIENDSHIP Yes I know we are still friends but it is not the same as last year when you used to come and talk to me about all different sorts of things (I then shared a memory with her) 3 I GOT A KICK out of you and I noticing all the little similiarities we share even though we are as different as night and day. 4, WHEN YOU TOLD ME of some of the things you went through it reminded me of things I went through when I was younger and you touched my heart and my heart went out to you 5. I ONLY WANTED to be a blessing in your life and to be a goodfriend and to uplift your spirits encourage you and make you feel special and loved 6 BUT I RUINED EVERYTHING because one of my weaknesses as a human being is that when I like something like a song or a food or a person, I overdo it and sometimes it causes people to leave me or in your case I made you no longer see me as a kind caring friend but as an annoying friend and pest and I HATE MYSELF for making you feel that way,7,I KNOW that I have given you compliments about your looks and told you things like I think you are beautiful and that I am attracted to you and that is true because you are beautiful but I think I might have given you the impression that I am in love with you and if I ever gave you that impression I AM SO SORRY. Yes I love you and Yes I care about you Yes I think you are beautiful and Yes I find you attractive becasuse HELLO I am a guy and I know a beautiful attractive woman when I see one BUT I AM NOT IN LOVE with you and the ONLY love I can give you is the love of a good friend. The reason I gave you those compliments was because one time when we talked you told me that you did not think you were pretty and I just wanted to help you feel good about yourself.. I am SO sorry if I gave you the wrong idea and I 100 peercent you backing away from our friendship if I ever gave you that idea. 8, WHEN I THINK BACK ON OUR FRIENDSHIP My favorite day will always be your beirthday because I helped make your special day a little bit more special and the worst day was the day you no longer saw me as a kind caring friend but as an annoying friend and pest. 9. I DO HAVE ONE HUGE FAVOR TO ASK I know that you rejected my friend request from my new facebook so it is obvious to me that you do not want to be friends with me anymore on facebook I understand and because of that I DO NOT WANT YOU TO SEND ME A FRIEND REQUEST NOW. HOWEVER if someday you found it in your heart to send me one IT WOULD MEAN SO MUCH TO ME and I WOULD REALLY APPRECIATE IT and I will tell you why, When you rejected my friend request it really hurt because I find myself thinking to myself that you told me everything was okay and that we are still friends and that made me feel good but when I see that you rejected my friend request it just makes me feel that a part of you does not forgive me trust me or whatever so someday if you ever change your mind I am just saying that it would mean a lot to me if that day ever happens someday 10 MOVING FORWARD If you ever want to talk to me about anything I will always be there for you if that is what you need from me as a friend but I will also leave you alone and give you the space you need if that is what you need from me as a friend. 11. SO IT IS TIME TO SAY GOODBYE TO THE PAST Take car Friend. Your friend Jimmy P.S. I will NEVER ask you at work if you read this letter. The end. So I have know idea and I will never know if she read this. As I said I do not regret sending the letter no matter her reaction because I wanted her to know these things. But I dont know if she deleted my facebook without reading it first (My friend thinks she read it but I will never know and I do not know if the reason she no longer wants to talk to me is because I embarassed her by putting it on her wall, or whether it was what I wrote or both,All I know is that I have to leave her alone and by doing that maybe someday we can move on (Of course is she ever does talk to me I will offer to make amends) but other than that id we ever do become friends again I cant stop caring about her but I also know that I am going to keep it very low key but if she thinks it is better that we no longer be friends than I have to do what is best for her, I remember thinking last year before I ruined everrynting Why do I have these feeling for this girl I cant be with her I am married and she is way too young for me and I was thinking that maybe God put me in her life to do those things I said I wanted to do in the letter BUT at some point I had done what I was supposed to do and I overstayed my welcome and usefullness so maybe it is just time for me to stop being her friend anyway I do not know I miss her and seeing her everyday hurts but I have to move on and leave the rest up to her not just for her sake but for mine too.