Where's The Light?

Tracing this back to this morning at 11:30, I was heading to the Saint Luke's Episcopal Church in Montclair Township, New Jersey for a personal reason upon leaving a meeting at the same exact time. I was going to head to the library on route...but, I couldn't seem to do so for another personal reason (both not related). However...by the time that I've arrived at the church, I've wind up seeing a woman (about my age) chatting with another person (that didn't bother me as I was getting myself prepared in a three-minute time limit).

Then when she has approached where I was at, she winds up talking to another person (one of them I know from Belleville Township, New Jersey) and was wondering why she didn't approach me on route. Then she winds up bringing someone that she knows and at the same time, I wind up seeing in the same place often and winds up asking her if she knows (not going to mention the name) as an introduction...of course, this happened twice before that (one of them from June 1 of last year when I was at a meeting at the Saint Luke’s Episcopal Church as I didn't succeed at breaking out of and another one from November 14 of last year at a meeting at the Unitarian Universalist Church as I was able to break out of easily next day at a meeting at the Central Presbyterian Church).

From June 1 and November 14, I wind up having thoughts of railroad injuries/railroad murders...as well as highway thoughts of highway injuries/highway murders...but the one from November 14 diminished as I was able to successfully approach them after a meeting...just embraced her and told her who I was. The one from June 1 still remains unsuccessful and the one from this morning has just started and thoughts of railroad injuries/railroad murders occured.

Retracing it back to this morning at 11:30, I’ve ran into the same person (that I’ve saw at the Saint Luke’s Episcopal Church) at a meeting at the Saint Luke’s Episcopal Church on January 25. I’ve greeted her and then an man about 87 years old came up to me and asked me if I was alright.

I at first had an ideation of wanting to swing my fist at him him...as well as piercing my fingernails and teeth inside of his skin for it after I personally know that woman since two years ago...besides, he does this every time I talk to a woman...I’m now thinking about telling the police on him if he does it again without him knowing. Better be lucky that the railroad is not near it or thoughts of railroad injuries/railroad murder...as well as highway thoughts of highway injuries/highway murder didn’t occur. That wouldn’t even get rid of the rest of this problem.

Retracing it back to this morning at 11:30 for the second time, I was thinking “why didn’t I associate with anyone that’s Jewish...why the **** would I associate with anyone that is Christian, Roman Catholic...as well as those that are gentiles (trying to go into Judaism since 2009)?” (like always).

This situation then traced back to when I was at a New Year’s Eve party in Nutley Township in 2017 (as I was invited to an evening church service by someone that I knew...the party followed in the same house) and the situation there is similar (and realized that I should’ve went to New York City to see the ball drop live regardless of it being thirteen degrees outside and take someone that resides in Bergen, Hudson and Passaic Counties in New Jersey...as well as Orange, Rockland and Ulster Counties in New York with me) and I’ve set plans to notify the situation online to anyone residing in Lithuania.

On July 9 of last year, my high school reunion was scheduled for September 22 (as I’ve graduated from Henry P. Becton Regional High School in East Rutherford, New Jersey on June 19, 2008). However, I’ve seen a name of a person that blocked me on Facebook as it was mentioned that she was going to be present. I’ve then sent out a notice on that evening for someone in all of Lithuania, all of Sweden and Toronto, Ontario (Canada) to decide if I should attend and was not going to attend until I’ve received it from them as other nations listed did not matter...even if they gave me their opinions and was giving until August 31 where I would automatically not attend.

In fact, if I wind up seeing anyone from there that has blocked me on Facebook, ...as well as highway thoughts of highway injuries/highway murders.

Retracing it back to this morning at 11:30 (one last time), I wish I can trace it back to February 8, 2016 through about October 19, 2016 (at the Bnai Keshet-one block from the Saint Luke’s Episcopal Church, Unitarian Universalist Church and Saint Luke’s Episcopal Church)...but, I want to leave it to a Jew residing in Toronto, Ontario (Canada).

As for me...if I don’t enjoy the environment (includes certain people in certain groups/makeovers), I will not integrate with anyone or would integrate with a selected few. If my past is dangerous or close to dangerous (includes certain people in certain groups/makeovers), I will also not integrate with anyone or would integrate with a selected few.

I wouldn’t say that no one has to because I don’t believe that those that say it to me would say it to anyone else as the same thoughts and ideations would’ve came forth.

At the same time, I’m trying to get someone that’s Jewish residing in Almaty City (Kazakhstan); Ashgabat City (Turkmenistan); Auckland, Auckland Region (New Zealand); Baku City (Azerbaijan); Beirut, Beirut Governorate (Lebanon); Bishkek City (Kyrgyzstan); Dublin City (Ireland); Dushanbe City (Tajikistan); Iqaluit, Nunavut (Canada); London, England (United Kingdom); Schaan Municipality (Liechtenstein); Sydney, New South Wales (Australia); Tashkent City (Uzbekistan); Tehran, Tehran Province (Iran); Tel Aviv, Tel Aviv District (Israel); Toronto, Ontario (Canada); Vaduz Municipality (Liechtenstein); Whitehorse, Yukon Territory (Canada); Yellowknife, Northern Territories (Canada) and Zurich, Zurich Canton (Switzerland)...as well as all of Lithuania and all of Sweden (that is Jewish) that would understand why the rest of this would happen.

-I did not leave out any municipalities and nations...I’ve only placed it in a way where I only allowed certain ones for certain aspects of help and if I enjoy those nations. I only go by which nations are on my mind and perhaps which ones I do not always recognize...but exists on the map/globe-

I wish I can get someone from Bergen, Hudson and Passaic Counties in New Jersey...as well as Orange, Rockland and Ulster Counties in New York...but I’m currently afraid that...number one, other people from the United States would jump in after I didn’t ask for them...number two, I wind up receiving stupidity from people in the United States (especially from my age group...twenty through twenty-nine)...both does cause me to have thoughts of train injuries/train murders...and number three, I’ve saw that as of 2003 (when I was attending Alfred S. Faust Intermediate School as I was in eighth grade) that I communicate with foreigners and can do it with Jews better than I am able to do with Americans and didn’t notice it until 2009.