Should I give up on him? (Need advice pls, esp appreciated from the men on here)

As a heads up, English isn't my first language, so pls don't mind the mistakes, and this is gonna be pretty long I think.

So I met a guy on a dating app, and he was extremely into me from the beginning which surprised me, since most guys I had messaged with weren't that engaged in our connversation, which might be mainly due to me being awkward and overly self-conscious, it's also quite difficult for me to open up to new people. But the guy seemed to be okay with that. Since the beginning we texted the whole day and talked on the telephone almost every night for 1-4 hours (we couldn't meet for 2 weeks as he was out of town). He would talk about how he had never felt such a strong connection with a girl before, he even talked about introducing me to his parents, which I was whoa that's quick, but since I liked him it didn't scare me off. Actually, we are pretty similar in the self-conscious and insecure aspect, just from what he said and the topics we talked about (and we really talked about a lot of deeper and more personal things). And when I was busy and didn't answer for a few hours he'd send follow up messages, which I'd honestly more expect from girls than boys.
Then we finally met last week and although we were pretty awkward around each other, I wasn't disappointed, I also liked him irl, and he also seemed to like me. We held hands and he stared at me lovingly if that doesn't sound too over the top. Since it was really really cold that day, we searched for shelter and ended up at his place (was that dumb of me to agree?). So we kissed at his place, and I don't know if I asked him before or shortly after, but I asked how many relationships he's had till now, because the thing is, I've never been in a relationship before and have not done anything more than awkward kissing till now (I am 20 and he is 21 btw). He has also only had one 2 months relationship with a girl who seems to have ghosted him towards the end and who broke up over text. I told him that I was inexperienced and hinted at my insecurities I had regarding physical contact, since I am so inexperienced. He said he was surprised and never would have though just from seeing my photos. We then made out. Quite aggressively. He sucked my tongue, lips, ear, neck, touched my butt, breasts (over clothes), and picked me up and tried to carry me to the bed. I actually reciprocated his kiss and let myself be touched. But I was in inner panic the whole time. I didn't really push him back decisively, but when he tried to put his hand under my top I stopped him, and I am sure he noticed I wasn't comfortable, but he also didn't stop trying to pick me up and stuff. Though I didn't feel (really?) forced the whole time, I still liked him. We cuddled afterwards, though I was super awkward and I'm sure he also noticed that. I'm also really bad at expressing my feelings in the beginning and maybe combined with his insecurities that was a bad combination. We met again the next day for dinner, held hands, I was awkward again, and he asked me when we were walking around afterwards if yesterday was too much for me. And I said yes, a little bit, I'm still new to that stuff, and I also told him that I can only open up to people slowly. That seemed to be okay with him, he gave me a goodbye kiss, and I we parted. I have to say though that I was in inner turmoil since the first date because the whole thing went too fast for me, and I also asked myself if maybe maybe he was on the look for a mature girl who would have sex with him quickly, so I kind of rebuilt the wall he had broken down before. We met again on the weekend, watched a movie, cuddled, he nuzzeled his nose into my hair, played with my ear, we went out to grab a bite, and he told me he only sees us as friends because the spark was lost for him. I was super hurt and confused, asked him why, he probably was embarrassed and didn't want to hurt me, and said it was because the passion was lost for him. I asked him if it was because of my looks, character, he said no, and we parted. On the drive home I was obviously hurt and though about it a lot. I didn't and still don't really understand how there can be real passion on the first date and why it was lost. I think real passion takes time, at least for me. He had been so invested in me before, how can that just disappear into nothing so suddenly? I asked him if we could talk, he said yes and I asked him about everything totally openly. His ultimate explanation as to why was my lack of reciprocation when we made out and he had felt unwanted by me and that was such a hit in the face and turnoff for him that he couldn't get it out of his head afterwards. Which I don't understand, he knows I'm a virgin, wouldn't you be able to understand my reaction maybe just a little bit and not interpret it as rejection? These are just my (maybe desperate) thoughts, but I think his whole thought process might be a result of his insecurities combined with his own inexperiencedness. I could imagine his girlfriend was older than him and was his first time, maybe she rushed into things with him (I don't think she was serious from what he told me), so he thinks that's the only normal way how a relationship has to start since it is his first and only experience.
A last thing about myself, I carry quite a lot of psycgological baggage with me, just from childhood and stuff. I had/have? an eating disorder and have a lot of anxiety about many things, but I am pretty good at hidding that. And I am working on it with a psychologist. Is that an extremely big turn off for guys? I can understand it if that's the case, I wish I wasn't like that, but I can't change how my past made me into the person I am now.

Now my question is, am I dumb for wanting to not give up? He told me that he still thinks I'm great and wants to stay friends and that maybe the spark would come back later on but no guarantee. But I'd also like to explain myself some more and ask him about his past relationship. I probably am dumb. But am I delusional and overly desperate? I'd really really appreciate your honest thoughts.

In case you don't think I'm totally mental and that there is still a chance, how should I go about it? Talk about everything freely with him and if he can deal with the mess I am then maybe we can work? Try and look extra attractive? Though that's not the core of the problem. Well, if you made it till now thank you for listening to me.

From a sad lonely girl that thinks she will eventually die alone or marry a cat