How can i get my girlfriend back?

Me and my girlfriend have has some troubles recently, weve been together for 9 months now, we live together and have a kitten. since the start of our relationship i have been very paranoid, accusing her of stuff she never did, reading her phone etc. its so hard for me to admit this because i was in denial for so long. it got to the point where i pushed her away and away, until she said if it doesnt change she cant be with me. we now live together and have done for the past 4 months, have a beautiful home and a lovely kitten. we used to work together and i left the company. when i left i found it very hard to be away from her, i kept texting her saying i dont think you love me etc, everytime she would get mad at me and moan. it got to the point where she said she cant do this anymore so we had a big discussion and decided to split. after a bit of time apart, she sent me a message saying she hopes we can work stuff out because she misses me, we had a genuine connection and when i wasnt paranoid we got on like a house on fire. she said she wanted to work through things, try ad be a happy family again - ive recently started to get help with my anxiety and paranoia, and i genuinely believe its working. one day, my girlfriend will kiss me, cuddle me etc. the next, she wont, doesnt wanna cuddle in bed, doesnt text me or talk to me. its really strange, i try to bring it up but she doesnt wanna talk about it. i just really dont know what to do and i need some help. i love the girl to pieces and would give anything for this problem to go away. she never gave me a reason to be paranoid and never once did anything to hurt me. i dont know why i am, snce a yyoung age i have been the same, my girlfriend cheated on me when i was 14 and its stuck with me ever since. when we're at home shes fine with me, as soon as she leaves the house she doesnt wanna know me. i dont text her constantly, i send her the odd text to make sure shes ojay but she rarely replies.

its really messing with my head, one minute she wants to sort it out and then the next she doesnt.

yesterday i drove 4 hours with her so she could go and have a tattoo done, when we got home i said i was going to take her out on a first date again so i booked a table for us to go and eat (at a very posh place shes always wanted to go) she then told me she was tired and didnt want to go and asked if i could change the booking to friday. she then went out with her old work friends and didnt come home until quite late. usually i would be texting and ringing being really worried, but this time i didnt moan, didnt say anything just asked if she had a nice time.

when she came in she gave me a kiss, sat on my lap and cuddled me.

after that we got into bed, she didnt want to cuddle and this morning before we left for work she wouldnt kiss me either.

what should i do? i'm literally broken inside, im trying so hard to put on a brave face at work and pretend im ok, but im really not ok. my stomach is in knots, constantly burny butterly feeling all the time. its horrendous and i want it to stop.