Affair

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I have posted before I am having an affair with a married man who I really love and as much as I have tried to let him go but we always end up back with each other. Believe me I have tried really hard, we stopped all contact and it was the hardest thing ever and then we ended up back at square one.

He is 35 and has kids and has been married for nearly 14 years. We met through friends and initially it was fun . I know that sounds terrible but it's the truth. Now he says he loves me and doesn't love his wife but he won't leave because of the kids.

He says things like he can't bear to see me with another man and that he doesn't think he ever loved his wife.

This affair has been going on for well over a year and I'm head over heels for him. I really do love him but as much as I try to leave him and we have done it several times we always end up back together.

I know people will think why doesn't he divorce his wife but in the Islamic faith it's frowned upon.

I actually feel helpless and have no idea what to do. I have tried leaving him and that has not worked at all. I've worked in different cities kept myself busy at work and stopped all contact but I always end up at square one. I have even tried to going on a date when we had no contact but he is always on my mind.

Anyone in a similar situation and can any one give advice on what to do because I feel like I can't leave him because of how much I am in love with him

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@Waysa ,

Waysa wrote:

I actually feel helpless and have no idea what to do.

as you've been advised already

Quote:

jespah

Tue 20 Jun, 2017 09:13 am

@Waysa ,

Then try harder.

Seriously - and I'm sorry if that sounds like a flip response - but give back anything you've been given, block him on all forms of contact (and I mean ALL), don't open your door to him or open letters from him and tell him to go scratch.

Or get counseling until you are strong enough to do so.

You are a grown woman and you have control of your destiny.

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@ehBeth,

I have tried my hardest and I'm still at square one

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@Waysa ,

Talk to a counsellor.

Do not contact the man. Do not accept contact from him.

It really is that simple.

It's not fun, it can be painful but it is simple.

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He's misleading you by telling you that Islamic divorce is not permitted.

He's using his kids as an excuse to not be with you.

Is he supporting you?

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@PUNKEY,

I'm from the Islamic faith myself and i know it can be done but I know his family very well and if he left it would cause all sorts of problems for him.

No he doesn't support me. I have a good job and can support myself.

Do you think he is using that excuse?

I questioned it and asked him and he said he loves his kids and knows that if he walked away he couldn't be a hands on dad like he is now.

He has recently said he isn't attracted to his wife. Me and his wife are the complete opposite In looks and personality.

I just don't know what to believe anymore and I'm finding myself stuck even if I try to let go

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Are they still having sex?

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@PUNKEY,

Yeah he is .. he may not have admitted it but I know they still are

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@Waysa ,

Quote:

Now he says he loves me and doesn't love his wife but he won't leave because of the kids.

As much as you might want to believe what he is telling you, he might be lying to you.

If he is not being truthful to his wife, what makes you think he's being truthful to you? Just something to think about.

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