@Krumple,
Hmmm. So I am supposed to just look the other way and not care (or pretend to not care anyway), so he can be happy (content)?
As much as I am a fan of picking my battles instead of blowing up everything that irritates me, this is not one of those times. I guess the bigger issue is that I feel like I'm always the one putting in the efforts to make sure our relationship stays alive (planning date nights, surprises for anniversaries, putting in more effort when it comes to sex, etc), so when is it my turn to be taken care of? I don't do it just so he will do it back, but once in a while might be nice so it doesn't feel like I'm being taken advantage of.
Generally, I am the type to be happy if the other person is happy whether it be my husband, kids, friend, or other relative. I suppose the thing with this particular situation is that I want to make him happy. Emphasis on the "I." I know a person cant fully depend on one other person to make them happy. We shouldn't be co-dependent. We have many relationships and we also need to do things for ourselves to stay happy and healthy.
I guess I just can't help but feel like if he were satisfied and happy with ME then he wouldn't do it. Makes me feel like a failure even though my rational side tells me I am not. I KNOW I am a good wife, I KNOW I am a good mother, I KNOW I am a good person in general.
I think I feel like I am more willing to make to changes (OR do the best I can to not make changes, ex: Not gain weight). I have no bad habits, but I can guarantee if I did and he asked me to stop that I would. He honestly wouldn't even have to ask, he would have to make some under-his-breath comment and I'd hop to it. So, why after me crying and expressing how this hurts me....why can't he do the same for me? To make me happy?