Is this an insult or Not?

So look I don't know if maybe I am a bit socially retarded or not. I have been told before I am most likely aspergers so maybe I read too much into things but I really just don't know.

So there has been a bit of tension between me and my girl friend the last few weeks. One of the big problems has been physical relations lately. There is a lot of tension surrounding it because I run my own business and have a lot of work I need to so yet she wants to spend every moment we aren't at work together and it's frustrating me because I need to get stuff done. In previous relationships I have done such work at night when my partner goes to bed.

So tonight we had a bit of an argument about that fact again because she is of the belief if she can get me to come to bed early with her a few times she will be Ok, however every time I have taken time away from the computer and come sit with her and willing to have an early night with her she tends to not go to bed early like she says she wants too and instead messes about till like 1.30am before actually going to bed.

This afternoon she had a stressful day at work and so I sent her a text saying how bout you come home and have a relaxing bath then I will give you a massage and an orgasm to help you unwind. Unfortunately it turned out something came up I needed to attend and so I went out and got back at 8pm. I cooked us dinner and then we sat down to eat on the couch together.

My question is this. At some point after dinner she turns to me and says "so I guess that massage and orgasm is just not happening then?". I sorta jumped thinking that was rude, being sarcastic or the like... was it? I took it as an insult straight up but she swears it wasnt. I can never tell with her there are so many things she says I honestly can't tell if they are meant as provoking or insulting or weather I am just being overly sensitive or perhaps been bought up to believe some things are insults due to my reaction when in fact they are not... ?

Any advice here? If that wasn't an insult then I seem to have things a little messed up in my mind. It was said in a fairly stern tone as well. To me it definately didn't come accross as friendly.