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Husband of 15 years sexting women and men

 
 
Reply Sat 28 Oct, 2017 07:31 am
This is my 2nd marriage married a childhood sweetheart. My dtr was living with us and noticed my husband texting all the time, while I was at work. She told me so I found this phone and the texts were deleted. Pulled phone records and confronted him. The 1st one was a women he met while we were both at a bar watching a friends band. He sat down and a women starting talking to him. She gave her number to him so he texted her a few days later. Sex was the topic and meeting. He said he never met her only texted. This was 5 years ago. It stopped when I found out last year. But 3 years ago he was curious about men and had 6 or more on going contacts. Texting pictures of private parts back and forth. He said he never met up with them because he didn't want to catch anything and how would he explain it. Then the topper is a young woman 30's husband late 50's. Two years ago a friend of the family girlfriend starter texting my husband about their favorite team. Then she sent him naked pictures and he sent them back. When I confronted him he said nothing happen. It took him amonth and a half to tell me the above. So to me he was doing this behind my back or in front of me. He said he loves me. I said how can you be in love with me when you are doing this. Everyday I asked him to tell me the truth and again it took him a month and a half. He was my world so I thought. He said he won't do it anymore which he hasn't as far as I know but the hurt is so deep that he did this and kept secrets. I get so depressed not sure if I want to stay with him. Help,
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Type: Discussion • Score: 0 • Views: 332 • Replies: 5
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jespah
 
  2  
Reply Sat 28 Oct, 2017 08:29 am
@Ladybug0524,
The sexting is a lot less important than the lying.

Go to counseling, either together or separately, and determine how you are both going to move forward. Your husband has promised reform before, and it hasn't worked. What else is he doing to show you it's not the same old, same old? Counseling can help him see why it's such a problem and it would be a step he could take which would demonstrate sincerity.
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PUNKEY
 
  2  
Reply Sat 28 Oct, 2017 08:48 am
Addicted to the excitement, bored, curious, bi, seven year itch in the marriage?

Who knows why he's been doing this?

The fact that this has been an on-going thing throughout your marriage is of concern. Unless he finds out why he has this compulsion, it will only get worse in the years to come.

Counseling is important. If he won't go, you go.

Ladybug0524
 
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Reply Sat 28 Oct, 2017 01:25 pm
@PUNKEY,
Thank you. He said he was curious and the excitement. But when confronting him he lied to me everyday.
PUNKEY
 
  1  
Reply Sat 28 Oct, 2017 04:23 pm
@Ladybug0524,
Now you know what addiction looks like.

Does he gamble? Drink? Mid-life male "manopause?

He needs therapy. Insist on marriage counseling.
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Ladybug0524
 
  1  
Reply Wed 8 Nov, 2017 02:16 pm
He texted one of them 8/23 and on 9/11 he introduced me to her. I asked him later that day, (we were at a motorcycle run and she was there) how do you know her. He said she is a mutual friend mother. I said have you ever talked to her before and he said no!. Find out they were texting 2 weeks prior, that morning of 9/11 and everyday after that till 11/4. I only found out by going thru phone records. I begged him to tell me the truth, and it took till December to come clean. Not sure if I can still be married to a man that put me thru all this stuff. Is it fair to me?
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