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Intuition

 
 
Jknow
 
Reply Tue 17 Oct, 2017 08:09 pm
I have been battling with paranoia and discomfort on my job for over a year. There is a married male colleague that I have to work closely with. When he first came on board, he was very friendly to everyone including me. Then, he started doing things like calling me queen and bowing down on one knee or reaching to hold my hand as he bowed on one knee. He would also pop up to my office to say hello, one time he told me that he could make it through the day after seeing me. At first, I just thought it was funny. Then, one day he asked me to go to his office because he had gotten some Christmas gifts for some of his colleagues. I accepted the gift, but when I later opened it, I realized it was an expensive gift so I attempted to return it. When I told him that I didn't think his wife would appreciate me accepting gifts, and that I don't take gifts from married men, he immediately explained that his wife picked it out for me. This was puzzling to me because when he had the opportunity to introduce his wife at a company Christmas party, he failed to introduce us. Well after I attempted to return the gift, I started keeping my distance and staying in my office. I thought things were getting better since I was doing my best to be out of sight and keep encounters brief, but then he slowly started back reaching for my hand or squeezing my arm when we have an encounter. My intuition still tells me that something isn't right, but everybody thinks he's so nice and naturally flirty. Do I ignore my intuition and not read into the behaviors as long as he doesn't try anything or do I address it and risk chance of being blown off as if I'm exaggerating like he did with the gift. I just want to feel comfortable and stop overanalyzing if that's what I'm doing.
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Type: Question • Score: 0 • Views: 194 • Replies: 2
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jespah
 
  2  
Reply Wed 18 Oct, 2017 05:43 am
@Jknow,
Tell him the next time he holds your hand, you're going to HR to report him for sexual harassment.

Then, when he inevitably 'forgets' or decides it's 'all a joke', make good on your threat. You don't have to put up with this bullshit.
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PUNKEY
 
  2  
Reply Wed 18 Oct, 2017 05:57 am
The guy is a jerk. Well known in the office. You are the next one in a long line, probably.

Wake up to what he's doing.

(Why didn't you call his wife to thank her for such a wonderful gift? )

He is repeatedly doing inappropriate things. Some would call that sexual harassment.

Trust your intuition: you are being used to build up his ego and sense of power over women in the office, one gullible gal after the next.

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