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Can some native speaker check these sentences and help me understand the grammatical errors

 
 
Jigs
 
Reply Sat 26 Aug, 2017 08:54 pm
The first such model was proposed by Caroll (1963), who defined school learning as a function of time spent divided by the time needed.
Caroll (1963) proposed the first such model and described school learning as a function of time spent divided by the time needed.
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InfraBlue
 
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Reply Sat 26 Aug, 2017 09:53 pm
@Jigs,
There are no grammatical errors in either sentence.
The active voice of the second is preferred, however.
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