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Shoud I dump him..??

 
 
Reply Sun 6 Aug, 2017 01:15 am
So a bit of background:

I have been with my boyfriend for 7 months we live together and he takes care of me so I dont have to work (Also want to point out that he makes an average income but will be wealthy in the future) he tells me he loves me and wants to spend the rest of his life with me talks about having kids, future plans etc. Says that we're made for eatchother.

He's 36 I'm 31 a model, attractive and have been told don't look my age. He's average, I fell in love with his personality and he's good looking to me.

Since this question has to do with age I just want to point out that his father left his mother after 20 years of marriage for a much younger woman. Also my boyfriends ex girlfriend was only 20.

So over the course of our relationship he would make jokes sometimes that he'll trade me in for a younger woman in 20 years. (I never found that funny) but didn't think much of it.

If the subject ever comes up about old rich men dating young girls he always tries to justify their choices by saying -sure the girl is using the guy but the guy is also using the girl. They're both happy. He gives her money and she bangs him. He thinks there is nothing wrong with it.

The other day somehow the subject came up again. He went into saying that : Hypothetically speaking if he was divorced and rich at 70 that he would get a young hot girl. I wouldn't get with a 60 year old that's for sure he said. He went on to say he wouldn't care if they would use him for money as he would get to sleep with them and that would make him happy. If I was divorced at 70 and had grown kids and no responsabilities and knew I would die in the near future then why not he said. I'd be happy and the girl would be happy. I would travel with her, buy her expensive shoes, purses, clothes. Have great sex- life would be good he said..

I was a bit shocked at hearing this..!! I could not believe how shallow and superficial he sounded. As well as the fact that he would be ok with someone just using him.. And seemed like he gave this a lot of thought. I told him it bothered me that he thought this. He said that he was just giving me a hypothetical situation.

I'm still so bothered by his comments. Turned off really.. Am I overreacting? Or is this a red flag?
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Type: Question • Score: 3 • Views: 491 • Replies: 5
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centrox
 
  2  
Reply Sun 6 Aug, 2017 01:26 am
It's a red flag if you are the kind of person who sees him being "shallow and superficial" as a red flag. The fact that you have those words in your mental vocabulary in connection with relationships, and the fact that those things he said have stuck in your mind suggest that yes, it's a flag, and yes, the colour is a brilliant blazing scarlet. In this case, no, you are not over-reacting. It's your life to spend how you want, however.
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centrox
 
  2  
Reply Sun 6 Aug, 2017 05:04 am
On the other hand...
Quote:
he takes care of me so I dont have to work

Not only one superficial person in this relationship, maybe?
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PUNKEY
 
  1  
Reply Mon 7 Aug, 2017 02:04 pm
Sounds like you are going to be one of a series.

That's the model he has seen from his father and that's how hr views women.

Best use this time to work and save up some money. You will need it in the future.
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centrox
 
  2  
Reply Mon 7 Aug, 2017 02:17 pm
She acknowledges that her youth and looks are her meal ticket but is apprehensive that the said ticket will one day expire. Them's the breaks.
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troppineapple
 
  0  
Reply Mon 7 Aug, 2017 02:52 pm
@KikaJanuary,
You have been with him for 7 months. You're living with him, and you guys have talked about some serious topics that most shy away from until after marriage, I give you kudos for that. But it all depends on one thing: Is he worth it? Is he worth fighting for?
My advice is, you have to know what you want; what you look for in a guy, how he should view/treat you, so forth. If you can figure that out, then you'll know whether to dump him or not.
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