Chick consumes 14,000 calories a day (at least the goal)

Someone once emailed me asking if I would let them smell my hair. Went on and on and on about how they would love to touch my hair and/or style it. I saved it b/c it was hilarious, but am too lazy to find it.

Re: Chick consumes 14,000 calories a day (at least the goal)


Yikes! Maybe....fat people need lovin too?
Damn...on a good day I think my calorie consumption might reach 1000! If it includes a microbrew or two.

I used to eat 6000 a day when I was in training. My wife makes fun of me, because I still have a habit of thinking I can eat about twice as much as I really can. We'll go out to eat and I'll order a few hamburgers and just eat one.

Haha! I had once a guy call me (at random) and started asking
questions about my shoes, then my feet, and stupid naive me:
it took me a while to realize that this guy was a foot fetish

I've heard about 'feeders', who are men who like to feed large women (like the one above) and make them even larger. They get a sexual thrill from the feeding as much as the size of the women. Strange but true. There's loads of stuff if you google "feeder fetish" or similar.

I have a really bad, albeit kind of cute joke that your post reminded me of.

A new woman started to work at a large company. Every day she was approached by a man, Mr. Jones, who stood in front of her and exclaimed, "Hmmmm! Your hair smells wonderful!"
This continued every day for about 2 weeks until finally the new woman could take no more and went to her Human Resources Department to file a complaint. Human Resources inquired as to the nature of the complaint and the new employee stated Sexual Harassment. "Sexual Harassment?" exclaimed Human Resources. "How can a nice compliment such as that be deemed sexual harassment?"

"Mr. Jones is a midget!"

Bada boom......

Acomoclitic ?- Shaved and completely hairless genitals are a turn-on.
Agoraphilia ?-Gettin' it on out in public is hot, hot, hot!
Alphmegamia ?-Bring on the older, seasoned men.
Altocalciphilia ?-High heels make this person horny.
Antholagnia ?-The scent of a flower brings about that special tingly feeling.
Asthenolagnia ?-When this person's partner is mamby-pamby, this makes him or her quite randy. I'm also kind of a poet and like, didn't realize it.
Cunnilalia ?-Just talking about female genitalia gives this person the proverbial or actual woody.
Cunnilingus ?-Tonguing vulva is titillating.
Doraphilia ?-The feeling of fur or skin is sensual and erotic.
Graophilia ?-Older females are hotties, and The Graduate is probably a favorite movie.
Gymnophilia ?-Turned on by nudity. Oh come on, who isn't? Sheesh.
Gynonudomania ?-If the thought of ripping clothes off of other people fills you with lust, you are a gynonudomanian. You should probably also invest in several credit cards to replace those quickly dissipating wardrobes. Hirsutophilia ?-Aroused by armpit hair and, most probably, Berkeley.
Macrogenitalism ?-Are you aroused by large genitals? Scandalous!
Medolalia ?-This person could hang with a cunnilalist since this person is aroused by talking about everything phallus.
Miscegenation ?-When two people of different races get it on, this person wants to get it on.
Omolagnia ?-Aroused by nudity? Freak. (Hey, wasn't that Gymnophilia?)
Phallophilia ?-This person only wants penises of unusual size, namely gargantuan.
Pubephilia ?-Don't ever shave for this person, because pubic hair is where it's at.
Tripsolagnia ?-A trip to the hairdresser is heaven, especially getting their hair managed or shampooed.
Tripsophilia ?-Sensual massage is the only kind of massage, baby.

It's a Bit Disturbing

Chremastistophilia ?-This person gets off on the idea of being robbed. Say chremastistophilian three times fast, I dare you.
Coulrophilia ?-This person wants a clown to entertain their pants off while playing with that long, red balloon.
Electrophilia ?-Electricity is hot. Some say even shocking.
Eproctophilia ?-"Beans! Beans! The magical fruit! The more you eat, the more you…" This person is horny whenever farting is involved. An ideal date might begin at Taco Bell, or perhaps with cabbage, beans, and a Farrelly Brothers movie.
Exhibitionism ?-This is someone who enjoys surprising others by exposing their naughty bits. I'm thinking an omolagnian would probably get along really well with this person.
Fisting ?-This person is aroused by either being the receiver or giver of a hand, fist, or forearm into the rectum or vagina. This also appears to be one of the few fetishes that can be easily pronounced.
Gerontophilia ?-This is an attraction to the old and enfeebled. If you're a gerontophiliac, you probably love raisins. Rent Harold and Maude.
Gynemimetophilia ?-The thought of someone who was born a man, but now stands corseted, made up better than Tammy Faye, in a dress and belting out "Wind Beneath my Wings," seriously gets this person off. It just has to be female impersonator or a male to female transsexual. Rent Tootsie or The Birdcage.
Harpaxophilia ?-There should be a dot-com site where chremastistophilians and harpaxophilians can hook up, because harpaxophilians are turned on by burglary.
Hebephilia ?-Teenagers make this person randy. Rent Bring It On with Kirsten Dunst.

Hierophilia ?-This person gets off on sacred objects such as crosses. I would say rent The Exorcist, but if that movie gets you hot, I need to bump this definition down a category or two.
Iatronudia ?-Doctor, doctor! This person loves exposing him or herself to a physician. The health insurance bills must be staggering…
Kleptophilia ?-The only difference between this person and someone giving themselves the five-finger discount is that this person gets horny when they steal.


Lactaphilia ?-Mammaries full of milk don't make just babies happy...
Maieusiophilia ?-Pregnant women make this person hot under the collar. This should be good news to moms-to-be asking "Do I look like a cow or what?"
Martymachlia ?-Aroused by having others watch during sex. Get these folks hooked up with a voyeur, pronto.
Nasophilia ?-This person gets mentally erect about their partner's nose. Even though this fetish description is somewhat vague, the name is just a scream.
Nymphomania/Satyriasis ?-Even though these folks are aroused by the uncontrollable desire of woman/men for sex, I'm envisioning cloven-hoofed flute-players and winged horses prancing merrily in the forest.
Ochlophilia ?-If you get turned on by being in a crowd, you need to get a job working security at Ozzfest.
Oculophilia ?-It's said that the eyes are the window to the soul. An oculophiliac thinks they are the viagra of the face.
Oculolinctus ?-Aroused by licking their partner's eyeball. I don't think I need to add anything here.
Odaxelagnia ?-Bite me. No, really, bite me!
Ozolagnia ?- "Ooooo, that smell! Can you smell that smell? Oooooooo, that smell!" Outside of bad old Lynyrd Skynyrd references, Ozolagnians are turned on by powerful scents.
Parthenophilia ?-These people have a desire to deflower virgins. You know, find a virgin, grab the flowers right out of their hands and trample them for the sheer joy of it. They're just so mean.
Phygephilia ?-Turned on by being a fugitive. If you also fantasize about finding the one-armed man, you may be a Richardkimballiac.
Podophilia ?-This fairly common fetish finds folks getting hot and bothered about feet. To each his own.
Retifism ?-Turned on by shoes. Would this be also known as Imeldaism?
Spectrophilia ?-These people get aroused by either coitus with spirits or from images in mirrors. While I can see the mirrors over the bed thing happening, I'm wondering about the spirit thing. Isn't The Enquirer still offering a bazillion dollars for proof? Why aren't these people rich by now? Is the truth really out there?
Thesauromania ?-While the name makes me envision someone with an insatiable Rand McNally habit, it really means people who are turned on by collecting women's clothing and stuff.
Thlipsosis ?-Ow! Oooooooo. Oh! Mmmmmmmmm. Turned on by pinching.
Transvestitism ?-This person has a secret bigger than Victoria's, because they feel absolutely divine cross-dressing.
Voyeurism ?-They like to watch. (Sounds like a good book title to me!)

I once dated this chick that DIDN'T like getting black eyes.

Didn't know they exist.

Slappy, AWESOME.

I loved all the replies though.

My oh My, cjhsa! Have you done your homework or what? Just please don't tell me you know all of these from first hand knowledge!

I have a Google fetish.

You too?? But, but....what if I don't want to share my Google with you?

I'm too lazy to google, but 600 lbs is about 200 kgs isn't it?

14,000 calories a day does sounds extremely dangerous, but I don't see how it's much different than women who will starve themselves to look a certain way.

That said, I do think that it's just a form of propaganda used to make people buy diet products. The minute that it becomes unprofitable for women to be underweight, is the minute the media starts trying to make us all overweight . It would sell lots of icecream, lol. I once saw doctor Phil, lol. He was trying to get women to lose weight and I found it funny how he was quite a bit more overweight than either of the women.

Oldsocks, no offense, but please make sense. It's never going to be unprofitable to market women to be underweight. And society in this country will pretty much NEVER make it fashionable to be a fat pig. So it won't sell alot of ice cream...LOLOLOLOLOL
LOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLOL

I'm a drunken loser on the net right now. Refer to my latest.

Lol If it didn't make sense it probably has more to do with your alcoholism.

It wasn't meant to be interpreted literally, but I still feel compelled to make a sleep-drunken, aimless reply. The day after somebody finds and publicises a cheap, viable way to starve oneself, that is effective everytime and requires no effort. That, or when and if the country undergoes some sort of depression in which people are naturally emaciated from lack of food.

I think both skeletal and morbidly obese are bad looks. People only look good thin if they are naturally thin, and haven't starved themselves to do it. Ditto curves.

That , and I've just developed a new diet program that works every time. It's called "Bottled air" and is much better for the kidneys than the Atkin diet.

It's roughly 270 kg....lighter than some sumo wrestlers... most of whom have skinny wives/girlfriends.

Thankyou.

Lol don't sumo wrestlers have an appallingly low life expectancy? Don't they also have special diets and massages that allow them to eat that much? I mean, the women is competing with pros.

It's about 60.


They gain their precious, precious blubber by eating chankonabe soup & guzzling vast quantities of beer....a mid-day snack might be 100 sushi rolls. They also eat late in the day & sleep as much as possible after each meal.

Chankonabe: The delicious secret to obtaining that large-and-in-charge sumo wrestler physique

'
Poor women, but as long as they end upon top, i suppose :wink:

Thanks for the link. Now I'm having chankanobe cravings. It does look quite tasty, though, so it's probably not all self destruction.



Hmmmm. I wonder whether that also applies to (m) any A2kers. NOt naming anybody, no, seriously, Slappy.




That's interesting. I remember being told that it was quite a bit younger than that. Still, 60 is a very low life expectancy for a member of a first world country.