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Sat 21 Jan, 2017 08:01 pm
About 4 months ago, I discovered flirty txt messages on my husband's phone from a co-worker. It turned out that he had strong feelings for this girl and decided that he could no longer be with me whilst he Felt this way about her and wished to start a relationship with her as well. The girl also had a partner and so far the relationship was just emotional and they had not spent anytime together outside of work. I was obviously heart broken when he left me but things had not been good in our relationship for a while. During the last 4 months I have worked on moving on and at the moment i'm in a really good place and happy. Anyway, things never worked out with this girl and my husband. She decided she didn't want to be with him and stayed with her partner. My husband and I have been working on being friends as we have two children together and have been getting along really well (first time in a couple of years!) There has been discussion on us giving our marriage another try but I'm very confused as to whether I should or not. Although I have forgiven him for what he did to me, I'm not sure I could ever be with a man who chose being with another woman over working on his marriage and remaining a family. Also in the back of my head I fee we are only discussing getting back together because things didn't work out with this other girl, although he says that is not the case. I could have forgiven him for cheating, but I'm not sure I could forgive him for choosing her over me. My question is, has anyone ever taken back a husband who left? Did it work out between you? If I was even to consider doing this I would insist on going to therapy first. I'm torn. I would love for us to be a family again but in my head I cannot see it working. For the last 8 years he has been a good father and husband and has only made this one mistake, unfortunately it is a pretty big one. Should I just get over it and give it another try for our family. I do still love him, well at least I love the man I married. I'm. It sure if I still see him the same way or not.
@Samaal85,
It's entirely up to you if you feel that your husband is worth a second chance, however, I think you should try couple counseling first and see if you can resolve any issues you've had prior to him stepping out of the marriage - during the separation and afterwards.
Taking him back and thinking it will all work out somehow, is a bit naive and I do think professional guidance will help you both and then you can decide
if you should remain apart or give marriage a second try.
Good luck!
You said things "had not been good for a while, anyway"
You need to find out what happened before this " incident."
Only then will you know if he and you can put this back together successfully.
Counseling will help. Don't try to put things back together that are not able to be repaired.
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