How do I get parental rights signed over????

Here's some info for you:

http://library.adoption.com/Termination-of-Parental-Rights/Grounds-for-Termination-of-Parental-Rights-Florida/article/8449/1.html

Good luck!

Welcome to A2K.

I'm not a lawyer, but this is the way I understand your situation.

Just because a man has parental rights doesn't mean that he is an active, useful parent. I believe the technical term is Sperm Donor.

All the same, he is the father of the child and has rights unless he signs these rights away. He also has obligations--such as paying support. You may choose not to press the paying of support, but he's responsible, all the same.

The court system is very interested in seeing that someone is going to give that child financial (and I suppose emotional) support. Therefore your baby's father is responsible until he signs those rights over to faciliate adoption.

Signing off on Parental Rights is a formal, legal step--and takes lots and lots of paperwork.

Just allowing the Delinquent Daddy to be a deadbeat is not a legal arrangement.

Have I cleared up the situation or just made it more complicated and confusing?

RE: How do I get parental rights signed over???
Thank you to Boomerang and Noddy24. You both have been a great help. But I do have a question for you Noddy. In the statement "Therefore your baby's father is responsible until he signs those rights over to faciliate adoption." does that mean the only way he can sign over his rights is if the person I am with is willing to adopt him? Thats what I dont understand. I dont understand why it is so important that there be a willing 3rd party. If I am capable to to take care of my son on my own, then why is it that he can only sign over if another man is willing to adopt??? Does that make any sense? But anyways thank you for your advice.

Thank you again Boomerang and Noddy24.

I'm no lawyer either. With the changes in divorce law the last thirty years I'm rather surprised that you have to declare a father figure being available for your child in order to get your ex's full release of paternal rights.

I suggest that you consult with the attorney you used to get your divorce in the first place. Idealy the attorney will still be sympathetic and supportive of your cause, and have some memory of your files and your case.

I think you should not have to do much more than have your lawyer draw up a "quit claim", to use an incorrect term but you get the meaning, for your ex to sign. Then persuade your ex to sign it with appropriate witnesses.

I really wonder if your ex is taking his dislike out on your child, or using the child to get to and aggravate you, not caring one way or the other about the child, but using it as a lever to upset you. In which case getting ex to sign may be difficult. However, there are folks who specialize in getting legally useable signatures under questionable circumstances and conditions. Your lawyer may be able to refer you to such an individual. (I'm talking about getting ex sufficiently under the influence of alcohol, and then convincing him that he is signing something else, or signing to make you madder. Two suitable witnesses hovering closely by to witness the signing and attest that ex did in fact sign where indicated, and a notary handy to seal it as well. Questionably legal, shady at least, but that leaves him on the outs most likely. Although it could cost you any rights to garnish his wages, lottery winnings, etc. for child support for ever.)

Kelly

My only problem with that is that the "father" and I were never married. We were together for 2 yrs, but never married. And as for him giving up his rights, it was his idea. The problem is that he is angry at me because I moved on and found "a real man." He is angry at me because my family can not stand him only because he was emotionally abusive, abandoned me during my pregnancy, threatened to kill me and now will not step up to the plate and be the father he knows he should be. He is the one who wants to sign over his rights, which I have no issue with that, I mean, I did argue with him about it at first, but then I realized my son would be better off without his father in his life. There was a time when I was maybe 2 months into the pregnancy, when we got into a fight because he had disappeared over the weekend, he wanted me to aport the pregnancy, then towards the end of the pregnancy he denied the paternity and wanted a DNA test done, I agreed to have one done, but then he backed down. If I could only explain everything that that "man" had done to me, said or made me feel, you all could truly see how better off my son is with out him. And yes, I said my son, not our son, simply because I am the one who carried that baby for 9 months, the one who went through a unplanned C-section, suffers from extreme back pain because of the epidural, and has spent 24 hrs. 7 days a week for the past 5 months caring for my son. Im the one who stayed in the hospital for a whole week with my baby when he had Rotavirus. I had to stay on the phone for an hour begging the "father" to come to the hospital to see his son. Im sorry but I believe that just because you made a baby, that doesn't qualify you to be a parent. The title of being a parent is something special, something wonderful and shouldn't be taken lightly. If you abandon or ignore your child, don't support your child, you shouldn't be allow the privilege of being called a parent! Anyways, I want to thank you for your advice, and I will keep it in mind if it ever comes to that! Thank you again!!!

I know it can be done -- my sister-in-law did it. Unplanned pregnancy, no longer in a relationship with the father, the father didn't want any responsibility, the mother didn't want to know the father was skulking around with rights to her baby, she had him sign over his rights.

She had no new man at the time, but her parents were a major source of support, and I seem to remember that their support was a factor. (She was living with them, my M-I-L is not working and could be a caregiver, etc.)

Anyway, I understand your reasoning, it is done, and I recommend that if you're going to do it, earlier is better. That's not legal advice, just my impression from having been involved in the situation with my S-I-L. Also, and this is purely anecdotal, I've noticed that a lot of men (not all, by any means) are more interested in toddlers/kids than babies. Babies are floppy and don't do much. It seems like dads who are uninterested in babies sometimes become interested when the babies are older. Kids laugh at your jokes, hug you, are delighted with presents... and can really start to look like you... (That's a powerful one.)

Good luck.

Thank Sozobe, its good to know that I at least have a chance to get it done. As for the "being uninterested because he is a baby" that is not the case. My ex has twin 6 yr olds and a 4 yr old from a relationship that lasted 5 yrs. and he has nothing to do with them. The only time he is ever around them is if the mother of the kids, who is still good friends with him and the rest of his family, comes to visit. All I know is that I do not regret my son, not by any means, but I do wish I would have had him with a better person. But I just happy to know that I have a chance. Thank you for your advice, you gave me a ray of light to look forward to!

Btw my S-I-L is in Texas, I don't know if state laws vary. boomerang gave you a great link!

Gringa--

Talk to a lawyer to see what the situation is in your state. Ask him whether it is possible for your Ex to withdraw from parenthood (with your consent) and if so, who is going to pay for the legal proceedings.

The state may put roadblocks in your way because the baby's father has the legal obligation to pay support--whether or not he wants to see the baby.

One of the fringes of Mr. Noddy's family signed away his parental rights because he didn't want to pay child support. The child in question was then adopted by her stepfather.

Now he pouts because his daughter calls another man, "Daddy".

Legal actions don't change the behaviors of worthless men.

Termination of Parental Rights
Most states have laws that make it extremely difficult or impossible to "terminate parental rights" of a natural father unless someone else is willing to step forward and accept responsibility.

Why? Because a large number of unwed mothers require public assistance to support their children. In order to receive public assistance, it is a prerequisite for unwed mothers to make a legally-binding assignment of child support to the state.

Because of the legally required assignment, the state will go after the father and seek the payment of child support. It is collected and paid into the state treasury as reimbursement to the state for assistance paid to the mother for the benefit of the child. If it were easy to terminate the parental rights (and obligations) of fathers, then many fathers would seek to have their rights terminated in order to avoid the child support obligation.

The state ain't stupid. The state will not allow itself to be stuck with supporting dependent children with taxpayer dollars and letting fathers off the hook for supporting the children they create. [After all, even though an unwed mother might be capable of supporting her child, it is possible for circumstances to change and the unwed mother might require public assistance in the future.]

If the father is a threat to the child----his visitation or custodial rights can be legally curtailed in order to protect the child----but it will not be easy to get his support obligation terminated unless another man is willing to assume that obligation.

Debra_Law is correct that the state does take an interest in getting the father to pay up when the state has to help with child support of various kinds.

The fact that you were never married explains why you haven't already talked to a lawyer. You are going to have to. The discussion here should prepare you to understand that discussion better when it happens.

I don't feel very good in hitting the nail on the head when I said the father was trying more to get back at you than having any concern for the child. I guess I'm getting too old or cynical, or both.

I suggest that you and this new man in your life attend some pre-marriage sessions before you decide to get engaged. The Catholics used to call them Pre-Cana conferences. I know that the Lutherns, Baptists, and some other religions in my town are offering the classes. The one I went to, a loooong time ago, spent more time covering how to shop on a budget, how to figure the real cost of borrowing money - and how to avoid borrowing money, how to get along with the in-laws - on both sides, and some private, intimate questionaires that each person took away, filled out alone, and then the couple compared answers between themselves, privately. As I recall two couples in that group decided not to go ahead with their wedding plans. I thought the class was a great success. Of the couples that did marry, only one has divorced. The couples who didn't marry saved all the heart break of divorce, at least for that marriage.

After you both go to the classes, if you are still sure enough to go through with marriage to him, then proceed on and let him adopt your child and then the state will be more willing to release the biological father from responsibilities. And it will be easier to get restraining orders to keep the father away from you and your child.

Best wishes,
Kelly

i am in same boat as u kind of....
I also am in the same boat as you are. I do live in Texas and I had been told from every one also that my husband who I am divorcing at this time could not sign over rights even though he wants to unless there was some one to adopt. my point to them was he wants to do it and plus my son would be better off cause he does not support him at all and hardly ever sees or calls him and he is a dope addict. And of course there wouldn't be another man to adopt because my lord we are just getting the divorce. But after speaking with my divorce attorney we have decided that we are going to try and go for it. i go in next week to talk to him about it and the way we are going to go about it is for my husband to just put it in these words to the attorney and the judge ( i want to sign over my rights to my son because it is just what i want to do and i feel that it would be in my son's best interest for me to do this). We all hope it works and that the judge will go for it. Now i do not know the laws for California but you see I was told pretty much the same as you and now know that i may actually get it done. My way of seing is like your's, if the parent doesn't want rights to the child how in the world can some one say that they have to keep rights. I know if it were me and i didn't want rights i would tell them there was no way they would force me to keep them. But i truly hope all works out for you and wish me luck as well. And don't let any one tell you that you have to be rich to get this done because that is not true, i am very very far from being rich but it does cost a bit. Best wishes and luck!!!

signing over of parental rights is called "relinquishment" and does NOT relieve the non parent of financial obligations unless so ordered by a court of law. states may vary.

i and my husband both understand that he will still have to more than likley have to pay child support even if he is allowed to sign over rights. but that isn't why he wants to do it, he wants to cause he doesn't want anything to do with him and no longer wants to be a father at all. and i do not see it good for a little boy to be subjected to the life his father leads when he leads a life like my soon to be ex husband. i do appreciate your reply though. thank you much.

Hello All:
just find away to make sure the other half is unfit, make sure that oters can write a letter stating that the other is unfit and it would be great if you had somebody from Socail Services on your side to like if he or she meaning the other parent has been in trouble with them. It would help you out greatly. Good luck.

Gringa- I am currently in the same situation that you are in while the father wanting to relinguish his rights. It is true though to the best of my educated investigative work-that you cannot give up parental rights in Florida unless there is a person to assume the responsibilities of the relinguishies rights.

If one gives their right of parent to a mother is the father still liable for child support?

Will he still need to pay?

Does the mother and the father haft to agree on the giving the rights away b4 a father can continue?

need help with what forms to file
I live in texass & have a 10 year old daughter that I have custody of.
My ex wanted to leave town & was looking for a place to stash her 3 years old, My daughters brother ( not my child), I volunterred to take him, but only if she signed a relinquishment of parental rights & allowed us to adopt him. which she did 10-31, the father has expressed interest in doing the same but has not done so, she had full custody of the child & he was married at the time the child was born.
anyway we were waiting for him to sign the same form so we could files these with a termination & adoption petition, when she showed up last night with sheriffs & claimed we had to give the child back, well over the 11 day period expressed in this document, the sheriff's stated since it was not signed by a judge we had no legal rights. I am trying to do this as cheaply as possible since my intention was to keep these two kids together & be able to legally provide care for him without someone coming to take him from us. anyway, can anyone tell me what other forms I need, what I shoud l do now, should I go ahead & file the affidavit she signed with a petition to terminate with an adoption & get the dad (who wants nothing to do with this kid) to either sign off or pay up.
or shoud l I file the termination by itself, get it signed by the judge & get this kid back where he is safe, the mother is a real looser & really wants nothing to do with this kid either. help please someone, got very attached to this child & since he is not "home now" very upset.
thanks