Reply Fri 15 Jul, 2016 03:34 am
Hallo,

**** of Branterburry here!

I have been talking to relationship consultant. I am 28 and interested in younger girls (let's say...20, 22 what is in my country very normal...). When coach asked me why? - I replied that (except for youth, beauty, naturally) I like when I am the one who is older, wiser, more intelligent (well, 6, 8 years difference - naturally). What surprised me she saw is as some sort of arrogance?! I clearly stated that I FULLY respect partner as my equal but that does not mean we are equal in everything - I know plenty of girls who are more emphatic, have better social skill, more responsible, disciplined and I see them as authority in this aspect. If they lecture me something, I will obey. On the other hand, I am kinda authority when it comes to questions of life in general because... you know... they barely started they university, while I long finished it, traveled, have much more life experience.

So once more, I never talk to girl with disrespect and I take them as equals (depends of course... every girl is different) but if I am older, I see myself to have upper hand in some things. Is that disrespectful or bad?



Lastly I'd like to mention one small thing.... I came from just such family. I recall happy and faithful relationship till death, little to no argues and very happy family life. so, I am kinda of shocked when somebody is telling me male the head of the family it.... I wonder what do they think...
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PUNKEY
 
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Reply Fri 15 Jul, 2016 06:45 am
"I see myself to have upper hand in some things."

So you want to be the richer, smarter, more experienced person in your relationships?

Why does such a woman (experienced, educated, world-wise) THREATEN you?

There's also another way to look at this: men mature much later than women, so at 28, you are really about 23. So your attraction to girls in their early 20s is not unusual
Count of Banterbury
 
  1  
Reply Fri 15 Jul, 2016 07:01 am
@PUNKEY,
yes, I remember one woman saying the same about male/female maturity.... Funny, she saw herself superior in every aspect, single in her 27 for many, many years, hates her mother and stepfather... Viki, is that you?

Do I want to be smarter, experienced, wealthier? Yes, that is traditional male position and I don't see anything bad about it.


Do I see as threatening when girls is smarter? You know, this is very funny. A moment ago I started similar thread in another forum with different kind of people and all I could hear about me saying "I am respectful, equal, threat women with respect" was that "I am aggressive, commanding, selfish, even alcoholic". Where do you people go for this? really? I made a conclusion from previous threat that a) people who speak things like you are either bitter, resentful or b) came from very bad relationship and even idea of "male protector of the family" invokes some horrible memories in them...

In any case, I don't think this will lead to anywhere.
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PUNKEY
 
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Reply Fri 15 Jul, 2016 09:33 am
It might lead you to be an lonely, bitter, self absorbed man who dies alone.
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maxdancona
 
  1  
Reply Fri 15 Jul, 2016 09:53 am
@Count of Banterbury,
What's the question here?

Any relationship between two consenting adults that makes both people happy is a good relationship. People are different and relationships are different.

If you find a woman who wants to be in this type of relationship with you as the authority, then obviously this is a good thing. Of course, you have to be giving her what she wants in a relationship as well... but sometimes things work out that way.

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