Question

Satan gives witches cat paws so they can sneak around at night undetected. Make her take her shoes off, and inspect her feet carefully. Find a Catlick priest and get a consecrated communion wafer. If you put that on her skin and she's a witch, it will burn her like a branding iron.

Also, build yourself a ducking stool and dig out a large pond in your back garden.

More instructions to follow once you've completed the above.

I know! You toss her into the pond: if she floats, she's a witch. If she sinks, she isn't. Either way, we're done with the ugly bitch.

You could use those bingo daubers, but be sure not to get any christian on your hands or clothes. Otherwise, they make fine spots.

Difficult to get off hands, impossible with clothes.