Table manners in western countries

In the UK, we set the cutlery so that the forks are on the left and the knives on the right.

We always stand and salute the picture of our Queen before sitting down to eat. This is usually accompanied by the host making a trumpet with his fist and pretend trumpeting our National Anthem.

Horses are never allowed in the dining room.

At the end of the meal, bagpipe music is played on the stereo and the Chef ceremonially marched in for a round of applause and the presenting of a customary sovereign.

The men then retire to the Billiards room for smokes and naughty jokes, whilst the women go to the Drawing Room, presumably to draw something.

In countries with no Queen and no bagpipes there are other rules about table manners.
Vary from country to country
This might help
http://www.etiquettescholar.com/dining_etiquette/table_manners/table_manner_tips.html

In the UK - Really yaswas?
Coz we is all da same see, mate.

I eat off a tray on my lap - NOONE I know eats at a table anymore.
It's just food, ffs.

You forget to mention tipping the soup away from you, and squashing the peas on the back of your fork !

And as for the French...how about them covering their heads and faces while eating birds !
https://windowthroughtime.files.wordpress.com/2015/02/jp-ortolan1-articlelarge.jpg

I suppose you do this afterwards:

Speaking of teeth....
I was sitting at a (posh) Wedding reception opposite an elderly aunt of mine.....'silver service'....Mozart trio in the background. On arrival of the food, she announced "I'll have to take me teeth out for this", and immediately deposited them on the side plate ! The trio played on without missing a note!

thank you for that lesson, Mr. Darcy.