Control

People who have little self esteem, who have little control over themselves, attempt to feign self mastery through the control of others.

Is there some kind of medical terminology for something like this?


So controling others is a way to make themselves feel better about themselves-but they aren't really happy. In the end they probably don't feel good about what they do. Could it be some kind of obsession then?

It is all a matter of degree. Sadists and rapists are control freaks. Dictators are control freaks. Mothers-in-law who insist that the young couple do things HER way is another expression of the control freak.

I think that the spectrum of control freak behaviors goes from the mild to the pathological, and is expressed in many different ways. So there are many psychological diagnoses which may fit in a particular situation.

Sometimes the need to control comes from a kind of fear, perhaps a fear of taking risks?

Whats your theory on that angie?

I think sometimes people "take control" because they are afraid to just let things happen.

Parents, for example, sometimes overprotect their children to keep them from getting hurt or disappointed. Of course, gexperiencing hurt and disappointed is part of life and children need to learn they can survive both.

A boss will often try to control everything rather than allow his workers to make decisions. This can come from arrogance, of course, but it can also come from an inability to trust others, which is akin to fear: fear that they will not do what's best for the company.


People who "control" out of fear seem to me to be the opposite of people who are comfortable and secure enough to take risks, with people and situations. They view failure as the worst of all possible outcomes, rather than as a learning experience.