Freedom Fries, Part Two

First, I think Seth Rogan is what the best of my former boyfriends called ronald reagan, then governor of California: an incredible, livid ass.

Second, 9/11 happened the day before I began a new job as an assistant teacher at a Montessori preschool. I watched as Bryant Gumble sat at the anchor desk of the once mighty CBS, fielding phone calls from Manhattan waiters on that first plane that flew into a too-large tower.

I thought, "Who could have done that?" As Timothy McVey had been executed a few days before, I thought, perhaps, his associates had. What better story could there be than revenge that dwarfed the first offense? Then, I realized that those guys probably could not plan to the extent necessary to do the deed. Who else? I immediately thought of CIA. Case closed in my mind.

I chuckled as I remembered my exit interview from Marygrove College when the half-cracked director of placement, a woman who could only be played by Glenn Close should there be enough material to film her life story, suggested that since a degree in political science was useless, I should consider applying to the CIA which she described as, " . . . a much maligned organization that does a lot of good."

Then, I went to Concord, MA to look at the homes of Thoreau, Emerson and the Alcotts to celebrate my new job.

But, the idea that the CIA flew those plans into the Towers never left my mind. I can hear the ghosts of Huxley and Orwell laughing. The CIA is probably a bigger bugboo than the alleged koch brothers who I am not really certain exist except as a means to distract the left and keep our minds off what is really wrong with America and the world.

The whole thing fits. Enshrine a puppet president who wants to defend his Daddy by lying to create a war fits so well into the history of the CIA.

So does hacking the computers of a nation run by a crackpot, born and bred to be a crackpot. What better distraction could there be than to cancel the premiere of what is surely a two-star movie, whose headliner should never have left the small town coffee house circuit?

Anyone for Freedom Fries?