The Virtual Vacation

My van went in the shop with transmission problems yesterday. Later that day, the brakes went on the other van so both our vans are in the shop.
We also then had to rent a van to get our stuff to an event. This all cost a good chunk of money, and no van back until later today, then we still only have one.

Now this is not going to send us to the poorhouse but it pretty much screwed our plans for doing anything over the long weekend, so I suggested a virtual vacation to the family.

Here's how it goes:

First we thoroughly clean the house, because no one likes to come home from vacation to a dirty house.

Then we argue over our destination, finally settling on something that no one is completely happy with.

We will then pack the van, taking great pains to forget a couple of important things, like Stephens medication or something that will cause us to have to turn around and go back to the house and add 90 minutes to our trip.

We will then sit in the van in the heat of the day for four or five hours, fussing over the radio station, who's touching who, and of course, filling the car with the odor of farts as soon as possible.

At the end of this 4 to 5 hour time period in which we haven't left the driveway, I will open all the car doors and say " You know, no matter how much fun you have on vacation, it's always good to get back home"

Then we'll go in and I'll make everyone turn in early because we've had such a long day.

I have run this by squinney and my daughter Kylie, and it has NOT been well received, and I expect my boy cubs will be equally unappreciative of my thought and planning.

Honestly, you do your best and no one cares. I'm going to my room.