on/off relationship

My partner and I have been together for five years. In the five years we've been together we have broken up several times, (and I have moved out) this is the third time.
Every time we do I stay quiet about it, I don't tell anyone that we have called time on our relationship (I always figure I will tell them when I was ready). But he is always the one to tell Everybody including his family and mine that we have broken up. I have moved out from our new apartment for the last 3 months but I still go over every week to help with his kids(he is a single dad) and buy groceries and stuff for them. Yet every two weeks or so I meet somebody else who says "I am so sorry that you and him aren't together anymore"
I would like to know what I should do. He always expects me to meet him out in public with the same people he told that we aren't together. I don't even want to be seen with him in public, because I am embarassed about what his friends must think of me.
I discreetly go to his house spend only once every two weeks over at his house and say nothing about our relationship to anyone, not even family. I love him very much and always hope for the best, but really I don't know.
What should I do? Are we or aren't we together? Is he not embarassed to embrace me and want to kiss me in public in front of the same friends he has told we aren't together anymore? Should I move on? Or should we try to work it out privately?