Dear fraggle, I hope you have finally achieved it and managed to experience the "getting off" pleasure.
I am a 32 years old man, I am not a specialist nor a sex doctor so the answers I can give to you are based on my own experience only.
When I was younger I and my ex-girlfriends used to have a similar problem. It was always, either they never had orgasm with me or it was rare for them to get off. It was very frustrating for me and even more for them...
It's been a long time since you posted this, maybe you managed to finally get there already and I hope so. If not please let me know and I can share more of my experience with you and possibly help with some hints.