Going away in a few months... has anyone had this problem?

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I don't really have a question for you but more of a statement, and am looking for anyone who has gone trough this before and some advice on the situation. I started going out with this great girl a little less than two months ago, I really like her a lot and she has voiced that she would like to be with me for a long time. This is all neat and good right? Well here's the problem. I am a senior in H.S. and will be going of to college in a little more than 5 months. She on the other hand is a Sophomore so will be here for a while. I am looking to go into a career in aviation, and currently live in NC, the schools I'm looking at are in Florida, North Dakota, New Hampshire, and on Long Island. I've gotten accepted to all of these. I have gotten very close to her and our emotional attacment becomes greater every day. I know its still a few months away but I know that I will have to leave her and wont see her for a long period of time. I don't want to loose her because as I have said I have gotten very close to her. I'm not sure what to do about it right now. I was just wondering if anyone had ever had a similar situation and how u dealt with it, any advice, comments, similar experiences, would help. Thanks Confused

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rorwizard, go to the best school, and then what happens, happens.

I was in a similar situation, but a bit older -- 21. I had made arrangements to study abroad for a semester, and then a few months before I was scheduled to leave, met a great guy. We became very serious very fast, and I came pretty close to canceling my trip, since the ideas of being away from him was so awful. He helped convince me that this was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, and I should take it, and what we had was more than strong enough to withstand it.

He was right. We're now married, and have been together for about a dozen years.

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Been there, done that. It was quite a while ago, but the basics are still the same.

A good relationship is not dependent on the two of you being in the same place. You're going to be going off to college (go to the very best school you can manage), and you're going to be busy regardless of where the school is. The level of academic intensity is very different once you get past high school.

If it's a truly good relationship, the distance won't put an end to it. My beau and I wrote many letters - phone calls were far too expensive, and there was no internet - and what happened to the relationship in the end had nothing to do with the physical distance in the middle.

Good luck with all of it, rorwizard. And congrats on getting into your chosen schools. It's fabulous to have choices like that to make.

<my current relationship has been long distance for 3 years - it may have slowed down the progress, but it hasn't effected the fundamental relationship>

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Sounds like your more concerned about your love life than you are your future Rolling Eyes

!!! Long distance relationships never work and that is a proven fact. If it's meant to be then you guys can hook up again when she finishes school!!! Think about yourself. You've got all kinds of women out there that will come your way!!! This won't be the only "one" you ever have these kinds of feeling for!! For crying out loud....wait til you go to college...you'll forget about her....sorry if this is disturbing but you were in desperate need of a wake-up call and the cold hard facts....Good Luck in School!!!!

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Long-distance relationships can and do work, LMC.

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Go to the best school possible. Write her, call her, that sort of thing - but concentrate on your studies and new experiences (that all comes with going away to college). For a long-term relationship to work, you have to have a future, which means you need to be as employable as possible. Hence, go to the best school and yes, you'll miss her, but in the long and short run it will be the best thing.

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Relationships like this may or may not work. At this point in your life, preparing for your future needs to be your most important priority.

People often change when they go to college. What you want in a partner in high school, may be very different than what you want after you are older, and have been to college, and seen more of life. You may be right for each other in the future, or you may not, but you don't really know that now. You need to go through the experience yourself.

Here's a true story to cheer you up. I knew a couple who had "gone steady" throughout high school. They broke up when they each went their separate ways in college. (They were the same age). They ran into each other about three years later. Last thing that I heard, they were married!

rorwizard- This is a time of your life of great change. Don't deprive yourself of the opportunity to broaden your horizons. If this person is right for you, she will still be after you get your education.

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ror - If it's meant to be, it'll happen. Time and/or distance doesn't matter if it's going to happen.

lmc - All I'm going to say is that the farther away I am from my wife, the better our relationship is.

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Thanks for the good advice everyone, I appreciate it.

I just wanted to say that I never intended giving up going to the school that I wanted to because of her. But you guys hit what I meant too. I'm glad to hear that you've been trough similar situations and that they have and haven't worked out. I do realize that I will change a lot in college and I am sure so will she. I don't know yet wether I will continue to have a relationship with her after I do leave here. I know I will try, but I have been involved in a long distance thing before and lets just say that didn't last very long. Thanks for your help and advice everyone.

lost_my_calgon - no I am not more concerned with her than my future, I've worked very hard an long in order to get into these aviation schools, and would not give that up for anything.

Quote:

You've got all kinds of women out there that will come your way!!!

ROFL, I don't know about that one but I hope that your right ;-)

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rorwizard - it sounds like you've done a lot of very solid thinking on this. <nods and smiles>

Congrats again on getting into your chosen schools - and good luck with your decision-making (about picking the best school for you).

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