The Chicken And The Egg

If all you guys had to go through PMS just ONCE, you would have new respect for the sturdiness of women. You guys get a little cold, and the way that you carry on, you would think that you were at death's door!

My very best favorite joke:

A guy asks his wife -- and the mother of his kids -- if childbirth really hurt as much as women claim.

"I can give you an example," she says, "Grab your upper lip with both your hands -- and stretch it out as far as you can."

So the guy does -- and with the top lip still stretched, mumbles, "Yeah...that doesn't hurt that much!"

"Now pull it over the top of your head," says the wife.

I go through SGS every month, Scape Goat Syndrome..just as painful, even more nerve racking.....

And Phoenix, I challenge you to get kicked in the nutz.

So after having sex, a chicken and an egg are laying next to each other in bed. After the chicken lights a cigarette, the egg mumbles out loud, "So I guess that answered THAT question."

I think I've told this one before:

There is this amazing new machine that allows fathers to take on some of the pain of childbirth. So a couple is expecting, and the husband agrees to go ahead and use the machine. The doctor says, "We'll start at the very lowest notch, give you some time to get used to it." A contraction hits, the wife screams, they turn on the machine, she relaxes just a bit, everyone looks at the man to see how he's taking it. He's just fine, feeling pretty proud of himself. They crank it up another notch, then another, and soon the woman is completely pain-free, and the man is doing pretty well too. He's thinking that women must have a really low pain threshold, confirms some things he'd always thought about them.

The baby is born, much rejoicing, then after a bit they take the baby home.

And find the mailman dead on their doorstep.

:-)

PMS is what men call it when women act like men do the rest of the time.

PMS toughens women up for the pain of childbirth...and for whatever else may get in her way.

Er - I have to be somewhere else. Bye.

It was just a joke edgar...

I'd rather lay an egg every day than go through PMS every month.

and I'd like to manage you and book your tour...college kids'll pay the big money for that....stick with me Montana and we'll both be rich...let's get together for Brunch and talk about it over coffee and say....omelettes?

Sounds good to me Bear. I'll bring the eggs ;-)

Since I just took a test that labedled me old as dirt, I have to admit that I can't remember the name of the woman who said that if men had a menstrual period once a month, they would have developed a major "Bleeding" holiday thousands of years ago.

Edgar, you wimp, get back here!

Gloria Steinem. "If Men Could Menstruate." Classic.

http://www.mum.org/ifmencou.htm

Oh no not men with PMS!

Soz, it has been a LONG time since I've read that essay. It is a classic.

Are yer through?
One thing that amazes me: One time I was instrumental in muscling a piano up three flights of stairs. Less than a week late a weak female asked me to open a jar. I couldn't get the lid to turn. Then she took it and twisted it open. Womens can make yer go from King Kong to Mr Bill in no time flat.