Entitlement: My Kid Deserves the World Wrapped in Ribbon

Only if deserve means the same as ought to have.

This has always seemed a little mercenary, but get with the program, Noddy. It's a way of life and neither you nor I can change it.

I used to live in a condo complex. I would watch people in mini-vans and buses pull into the neighbourhood and direct hoards of children to our doors. It pissed me off. I would spend a hundred bucks in order to give all these kids candy. While their fat assed parents would sit in the warm vehicles waiting to bring their kids to the next prime spot.
Ya, you could say this is a point of contention.
Ceili

Ummmmmmm - struggling to have a thought so early in the am......I mean, IF we did trick or treating, I wouldn't mind giving stuff to any kid - unless I ran out, I suppose....

Mebbe she could have driven them?

it is all a mystery to me...

Hmmm.

I see that as being one of those vicious cycle things. In my neighborhood, there are several families who know each other, but they aren't home. Why aren't they home? Because there is a big local outdoor event that was created in part because parents didn't feel it was safe to send their kids out to trick-or-treat. So since nobody is home and there is no point for us to trick-or-treat in our immediate neighborhood, we go to the local event, too, and leave a bowl of candy on our front porch. Which was empty this year for the first time (out of 4years), but that could just mean someone got greedy.

I like the local event idea better than driving 'em to someplace with prime pickins, but the whole vicious cycle thing is what really gets me. If there were a bunch of kids and parents out trick-or-treating, it would be much safer.

I live in a neighborhood where there are no kids. I used to buy candy for the kids who were brought over in vans by their parents. They only came every once in awhile, so this year I bought no candy. The problem was in the past, when they didn't come, I ended up eating the candy, which I don't need.

I do feel a bit put out by hordes of strange kids running around the neighborhood. Hey, IMO though, they are entitled to try. If a person doesn't want to go along with it, he can keep his door shut.

Noddy24- I am sensing a lot of anger and resentment in your post, that I think goes beyond the trick or treating kids. Am I reading you correctly?

As long as a kid (or parent) can figure out that we've got a good trick or treating neighbourhood, I'll be handing out treats (til I run out),

I was really quite proud when I overheard a girl of about 12 saying to her friends "didn't i tell you i have the coolest neighbourhood" - they agreed vociferously - apparently they live in a dud neighbourhood.

It was a pleasant evening last night, so quite a few of us sat out on our steps or porches and talked to each other between ghouls and princesses. A couple of neighbours had put on a bit of a haunted house thingie and it was fun hearing the hooting and shrieking.

I have no intention of checking if the kids are from my neighbourhood. I want them to have a great time. If I figure out that a group or two of the kids come from the nearest public housing project, I'm quite happy that they had the gumption to walk over to us - and managed to put any kind of costume together.

Since I live in the country, all the kids who come are driven and I never think about where they came from. It's only once a year and if the kids are happy, I'm happy.

I think the point is more about the word 'deserve' than strangers is costume.

I suppose I live in one of those good trick-or-treating neighborhoods. We usually get between 100 and 200. I just love handing out candy to those irresistably cute little ones, and we go through several large bags every year. We decorate our house and everything. Just love it! My son (age 9) is still into costumes & everything, and I look forward all year to walking with the other moms & dads and visiting everyone in the neighborhood while our kids knock on doors.

What I DON'T love is how later in the evening the vans pull up and unload dozens of highschool and college kids (some even older)...most of them without costumes. They scavenge the area in gangs of ten or more at a time. Many of them are downright frightening (and I don't mean their costumes.) At this point, we empty our bowl into the first group's sacks, turn off all our lights and watch TV upstairs. Last night, my husband even went out and removed our decorations when this started.

I'm sure glad we don't see vanloads of young adults arriving for treats here. I'm not at all sure how I'd react. Maybe borrow Cujo for the evening (a neighbour's lab/newfoundland cross) - no one can imagine that he's not ferocious - he's got the deepest loudest woof for an 18 month old, 160 pound puppy!

get some banner tape that sez
"Crime scene -do not cross" and string it around the porch.

Advice-Its what i do., usually I get big bucks for consulting.

Re: Entitlement: My Kid Deserves the World Wrapped in Ribbo


Noddy, I have no objection to giving candy to strangers. I think the issue that concerns you is one of entitlement. Are kids entitled to a good time on Halloween? Perhaps entitled is too strong a word. I do think that kids are entitled to be kids. If that includes trick or treating on Halloween, why not?

I live in a building with a doorman. The only kids who ring my bell are those who live in the building. It was a thin crop this year.

Thanks, all.

In my childhood--fifty, fifty-five years ago--Trick or Treating was a neighborhood activity. Time and effort was spent on Halloween costumes. A child in a "store bought" costume was pitied.

For kids, part of the excitement of Trick or Treating was being out at night without adults. When home owner responded to the knock on the door, costumes were admired and the identity of each child was established. We felt very wild and free, but in an old-fashioned neighborhood we were under automatic supervision.

I could appreciate a mother feeling that her kids are entitled to this sort of old fashioned (and probably long gone) neighborhood festivity.
The woman who wrote the letter made it clear that she felt her kids were "entitled" to as much free candy as their classmates were--whether they knew the donors of the candy or not.

In my childhood, store-bought costumes were inferior. Today, not only are costumes store-bought, but all sorts of mass produced individuality is available in house decorations. If people enjoy amassing seasonal decorations, that's fine with me. I'm far too busy to make rules for the world and I probably take a certain smug pleasure in raising my eyebrows and muttering, " 'Tsk, 'tsk, tsk,"

October was a trying month for me, so I'm probably 'tsk-'tsking more loudly than is seemly in these Politically Correct times when the neighborhood grouch is no longer a licensed institution.

Noddy, the world changed a long time ago. By the time I was trick-or-treating 40 years ago, people who didn't have store-bought costumes were the ones who were pitied. "Oh, home-made? You couldn't buy one? Too bad. So sad." In our neighbourhood at least, things are a bit more even now - homemade and bought costumes are appreciated.

I'm not clear how politically correct relates to any of this.

eBeth--

Criticism of the neighbors is absolutely not P. C. Gossip is acceptable, but scorn is not.