Little Johnnie

Little Johnny's at it again...... A new teacher was trying to make use of
her psychology courses. She started her class by saying, 'Everyone who
thinks they're stupid, stand up!' After a few seconds, Little Johnny stood
up. The teacher said, 'Do you think you're stupid, Little Johnny?' 'No,
ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!'


* * * * * * * * * * *

Little Johnny watched, fascinated, as his mother smoothed cold cream on her
face. 'Why do you do that, mommy?' he asked. 'To make myself beautiful,'
said his mother, who then began removing the cream with a tissue. 'What's
the matter?' asked Little Johnny. 'Giving up?'

* * * * * * * * * * *

The math teacher saw that little Johnny wasn't paying attention in class.
She called on him and said, 'Johnny! What are 2 and 4 and 28 and 44?' Little
Johnny quickly replied, 'NBC, FOX, ESPN and the Cartoon Network!'
* ; * * * * * * * * * *

Little Johnny's kindergarten class was on a field trip to their local police
station where they saw pictures tacked to a bulletin board of the
10 most wanted criminals. One of the youngsters pointed to a picture and
asked if it really was the photo of a wanted person. 'Yes,' said the
policeman. 'The detectives want very badly to capture him.' Little Johnny
asked, 'Why didn't you keep him when you took his picture ?'
* * * * * * * * * * *

Little Johnny attended a horse auction with his father. He watched as his
father moved from horse to horse, running his hands up and down the horse's
legs and rump, and chest. After a few minutes, Johnny asked, 'Dad, why are
y ou doing that?' His father replied, 'Because when I'm buying horses, I
have to make sure that they are healthy and in good shape before I buy.
Johnny, looking worried, said, 'Dad, I think the UPS guy wants to buy Mom .'