Figuring out why Veggie people are complete morons

The last 3-4 days all I've had to eat are fruits and vegetables. I usually have grapes, an orange or a banana, and orange juice for breakfast. For lunch I have a salad and some watermelon with some apple juice. And since I work nights I have to bring food with me. The last few nights I've brought a salad to work. And then around 2-3 in the morning I'll have some more fruit.

My motivation for doing this is that I've always wondered why some people choose to be vegetarians. I do not consider myself to be one. I enjoy a nice steak, and I enjoy fast food even though that food is **** for my body. If I could suck my own dick, I probably would. Yes, meat is awesome. Now I realize that vegetarians usually supplement their diet with grains, nuts, etc. Really all they avoid are meats. But, like almost everything else in my life, I'm taking this experiment to the extreme in order to feel the full effects.

And by effects, I mean, of course, amazing diarrhea and the worst gas of my life.

My ass is raw from wiping too much. I'm accomplishing very little at work because I'm spending most of my time in the bathroom. Two nights ago I had a very mild seizure. I woke up during the start of it and I remained conscious through the entire thing. It kinda hurt a little, but wasn't a big deal. But I guess it caused my butt muscles to become relaxed or something, and a long ass fart came out. This caused me to lol during my seizure. I'm going through boxers like you wouldn't believe, and all of them have wet **** marks in them.

I just got done in the bathroom a little bit ago. I would have to guess that approximately 75% of what came out of me was gas. The little bit of poo that did come out was mushy. I guess I shouldn't say it was diarrhea, but it was like there was very little keeping the poo together. It was almost... delicate. If I had poked it even the slightest bit, it would have crumbled into diarrhea. It felt like shitting pudding.

In conclusion, plants are stupid and so are vegetarians.

Discuss.