If I Were the Empress of this Flawed World....

Sterilise people who are stupid with children.

Having children makes people stupid?

Ask any teenager what they think of their parents.

I would waterboard George Bush for the remainder of his term.

If I ruled the world, every day would be the first day of spring
Every heart would have a new song to sing
And we'd sing of the joy every morning would bring

If I ruled the world, every man would be as free as a bird,
Every voice would be a voice to be heard
Take my word we would treasure each day that occurred

My world would be a beautiful place
Where we would weave such wonderful dreams
My world would wear a smile on its face
Like the man in the moon has when the moon beams
If I ruled the world every man would say the world was his friend
There'd be happiness that no man coud end
No my friend, not if I ruled the world
Every head would be held up high
There'd be sunshine in everyone's sky
If the day ever dawned when I ruled the world

When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.

-- Samuel Clemens

If I were Empress of the World
by Chai Tea

If I were Empress Chai, I would have everyone drive the speed limit to save fossil fuels.

Everyone would have to submit a request for any car larger than a Coralla or Civic, explaining why they need a larger vehicle. Having a child or 2 children is not an automatic exemption to own an SUV. Going on a road trip with a tent or kayak twice a year will not cut it either.

For those needing a large vehicle no more than 4 times a year, they will be required to rent one for the time needed.

For those who qualify for such a large vehicle, each driver of said vehicle would have to take a road test showing they are capable of actually driving the thing. Being able to successfully pull into or out of a parking space on one try, when there are other vehicles parked next to it will count for 50% of the test.

XXXX

Children will be required to sit in their seats in restaurants, movie theaters. When in places not meant for recreation, meaning parks, beaches, etc. they will be required to stay/walk beside their parents/guardians.

Parents will not hit their children, or call them abusive names.

Dogs and cats will not be left out in the cold, or left without food and/or water at any time.

more to come...

bump

come on everybody, we all know you want to run the show....



Welcome to your life
Theres no turning back
Even while we sleep
We will find you
Acting on your best behaviour
Turn your back on mother nature
Everybody wants to rule the world

Its my own design
Its my own remorse
Help me to decide
Help me make the most
Of freedom and of pleasure
Nothing ever lasts forever
Everybody wants to rule the world

Theres a room where the light wont find you
Holding hands while the walls come tumbling down
When they do Ill be right behind you

So glad weve almost made it
So sad they had to fade it
Everybody wants to rule the world

I cant stand this indecision
Married with a lack of vision
Everybody wants to rule the world
Say that youll never never never never need it
One headline why believe it ?
Everybody wants to rule the world

All for freedom and for pleasure
Nothing ever lasts forever
Everybody wants to rule the world

I would ban stupid parents from bringing their ignorant kids into shops skating around the store with those "rolling runners". You know, the runners with wheels on them.

Then, I would outlaw the future making of similar stupid inventions.

>Snort< Hand up on that one!

To begin with, I would outlaw black linings in purses. It's hard enough to find stuff in there.

Yeah! and no buying fancy purebreds until there aren't any in the shelters! And no leaving the nuts on your dog because he'll feel less manly without 'em... (at first I typed that as "no leaving the nuts on your god" -- that too. No unsterilised gods in my world, I don't want them multiplying.)

Chai, sorry, but how is a park or a beach "not meant for recreation"? And where will the kids run free?

And when you average all this stuff, the world would be no better...

(Hell is paved with good intentions).

So pleased with cypher's post, considering being obnoxious.

When in places not meant for recreation, meaning parks, beaches, etc. they will be required to stay/walk beside their parents/guardians.

Yes, that was worded akwardly, wasn't it.

My meaning was that parks and beaches etc. are places for recreation, and when children are not is such places as (above), they need to stay near their parents.



oh yes, and definately no unsterilised gods.

Ahh!

and all those who would seek to thwart my power as empress would be given jobs at the division of motor vehicles.

Good, so I can take a nap on the back seat (and dream of a better world).

Chai--

You have far more talent for Empress-ing than I do. I'm impressed.