Lawyer willing to make suggestions for A2K readers - read on

Jeez! Thanks, gadgetaddict!

What type of law do you deal with gadget?

i'm the most vile type of lawyer: one who tells horrible jokes. but seriously folks, i'm a litigation attorney - which sounds a lot better than, "
Plaintiff's personal injury."
and no, i'm not an ambulance chaser - i do my best to get there BEFORE the ambulance
So to practice negligence properly, you actually have to know a bit about insurance, landlord/tenant, corporations, medicine, litigation, and maybe even a tad of negotiation
so i hold myself out to offer help in these areas - if a need arises outside that scope, i can try to direct the poor soul - if help is needed in these areas, well, see the caveat i posted earlier in this section, and that A2K and myself are NOT responsible for any erroneous or just plain bad advise I gave.
That being said, here's a free bit of advise: You sir, over there in the bowtie - please do not wear black socks with sneakers.

gadget, I used to do insurance defense work in NY (it's been quite a while since I practiced - eek, 13 years and change).

We should take opposite sides of some legal debate some time. Could be fun.

Hi Jespah! I haven't chatted with you since i joined (some 50 or so posts to the web development section earlier)
Although I was never hired directly by insurance carriers to do defense work, I had been hired by several to do depositions - about 5 or 600 -
from the plaintiff's standpoint, the carriers hold the money, and the defense attorneys are in the way of me, err, my client getting their money.
from a practical standpoint, if it weren't for the plaintiffs, there would not be much need for defense counsel, or most of the adjusters...some know that and agree, some bust my chops and say i shouldn't even have pursued the case (at which point, they would have that much less work).
okay, enough back patting

M-O-M! He's pointin' at me!

lmao

<Rodney Dangerfield voice & eyes> - but on you they look good! - no offense!

Lot's an lot's of members at the site have greviously wounded me in my self-love . . . how much can we get out of them?

gazilions! first we must start a class. as i have no class, someone else will have to do it.

Heh, thanks gadget! And without plaintiffs, there probably wouldn't be seatbelts or air bags.

And without the defense, more runaway verdicts. The yin and the yang. The oil and the vinegar. The Abbott and the Costello. :-D

Or, something like that.

My focus, way back when, was product liability. I handled a lot of permanent wave cases, probably more because I was the only woman in the prods. liab. department than for any other reason. Also did a buncha construction cases - all of the mess from the LIRR and shopping malls and the like. Oh, and the law's bread and butter - auto accidents and slips and falls. I think I could probably still do a fall or auto case EBT (that's a deposition for those of you outside the US) on the fly....

"May I draw your attention to __(date)___, was there an incident?"
"And what did this incident entail?"
"How many vehicles were involved?"
"Were you one of the drivers?" etc.

Gawd, it's like riding a bike. It all comes back.

"May I draw your attention to __(date)___, was there an incident?"
"And what did this incident entail?"
"How many vehicles were involved?"
"Were you one of the drivers?" etc.

Gawd, it's like riding a bike. It all comes back.


-----
i'm terrible with quotes on the replies -sorry.
anyway, now you got me started - so stand back!
you are going the high route - the depositions usually go more like this:
(after the reporter gets the name and address, and even before that, everyone agrees to standard stips (which are different from each reporting company!) :
preamble, i.e. i'm going to be nice before i shtuff you in the tuchas real hard.
then i (and many other lawyers) like to ask if they were involved in an accident, and when they say yes, what date. As if them not knowing the date lessens the case. I get all warm and fuzzy when instead they ask my client, "Were you involved in an accident on <insert date>"
The, "What did the incident entail" part - objection - calls for a narrative response - although if i'm tired, hungry or bored, or i think the client can answer alright then i'll allow it, otherwise i make the adversary work for their money...when you're using an interpreter, though, you do anything you can to finish up....
how many vehicles - yup, valid question. never the word crash, but rather "impact" or "did your vehicle come into contact with another vehicle?" at which point you either get a yes, or a "huh?" and you have to rephrase
I NEVER use prior or subsequent - amazing how many liars do! simple is the key - before or after...
my favorite objections: 1) hearsay - you NEVER hear anyone object to these during the deposition (because a lot of the time you have hacks). and we can have a nice long post about hearsay
favorite objection 2) "So, is it fair to say..." at which point I object before even getting to the next part - I hate those, and I won't allow a shyster, err, fellow barrister to put words into my client's mouth when they do the ol' "fair to say" and summarize the last few responses, and for that matter, who says what is fair? that's a jury question (i think) so i just don't allow the fair to say schpiel.

Products liab - I've done the groundwork on those - VERY COMPLICATED, VERY EXPENSIVE to prosecute - now if i get a products case (very rare) I call Anthony Gair - have you worked opposite him? Top notch fellow.

Geez, I hate practicing law. But it's better than screwing up my phpbb board

Dunno Anthony Gair. Like I said, it's been quite a while since I did this. I used to mainly go to Nassau, Suffolk and Queens counties.

Oh yeah, prior and subsequent - what a waste o' syllables! I noticed that the folks who used those words had, for whatever reason, a burning desire to show everyone how educated they were. More than one witness gave them the blank stare back - sheesh, ya gonna try to impress or try to get info with which to win the case?

Hey there's nothing wrong with narrative responses ('least not that I can remember) - isn't the only legit objection under usual stips the ever-popular form objection?

Okay, we've now lost the rest of the audience.

What scares me is, I thought I'd purged all this stuff from my memory. Aak! Delete delete delete!!!

Found this joke in today's LangaList:

the joke - an oldie but a goodie!
okay, now that you've gotten me started:

What's the difference between a lawyer and sperm?

Something to do with prick I am sure

now now....
give up?

yep

Sperm has a 1 in a million chance of being a human.

LOL !! Me and my dirty mind