Shi

By Paul Andrew Bourne, December 25, 2006




I see not love again because of my former years
I kept the hate of love lost bottled deep inside
as - those days that I loved
I did with the heart of a fool
for I kept pouring my love in a broken cistern
I could see that priceless substance flowing through the wind
and I could see the open heart of my receptor
allowing the love its free passage to somewhere called nowhere
I felt an avalanche of hatred with the force of a volcano
that has been trapped beneath the earth’s crust for years -
the vengeance was pure and its price was free
as it kept destroying all my sense of self
with the same kindness like
the lamb caught in a den on wolves


I kept crying without the pleasure of tear
I kept singing without the melody of words
I kept whirling without a sense of direction
I was lost in the aftermath of love
I was wounded because of socialization’s principles
I fear not fear - as I was lost in hatred for love
but like a child I was reborn because of your care
like a child I am unfolding to learn to love again
as today Christmas does mark my new self
for like Christ, you have given me a sense of purpose
for like Christ, you have baptized my hatred with kindness
for like Christ, you have shown me that I must forgive
in order to love again
So I love you Shi, it has taken hatred’s lesson for me to love again
So I love you Shi