A Marlboro question

Well, I'll try.

First I've to spot a nice running stream. Then I'll wander around with a Marlboro pack in my pocket, just in case a lovely fecund woman coming through and willing to have sexual intercourse doesn't have any.

Then, I'll use my poor intercourse skills in order to achieve, (I'll tell her that Dys asked me such) a scientific experiment about the likeliness of the offspring woulkd resemble some Joe...

Wait some months...

Yes, yes, Francis that's the old french team spirit, science and all that tommy-rot.

Well, I just wanted to help a friend...

I almost made it. I was having sexual intercourse with a fecund woman while lying on her back near a running stream when she whipped out a Newport Menthol. I shudder to think what the resulting progeny will look like.

I had sex with a fecund woman while lying on her back.

I told her I wasn't thinking of Ed Asner.

Babamboombing!

Um....can I help?

I would love to help but I have given up the smokes!

(All these years everyone's been at me to give them up and now someone decides to give me a good reason not to - and it's too late! Dang blast it!)

Ooh. That's right. I don't smoke, either. And come to think of it, there is reasonable doubt that I'm still fecund, too. Guess they'll have to keep looking...