Everyone Should Start Smoking.

<snork>

Really that's a pretty funny observation.

You used to always hear people complain about smokers on airplanes and now they complain about being seatmates with an obese person.

chewing might be more effective, keeps the jaw busy, might even make food taste worse, and no second-hand smoke.

No butts about it...

Are those cig butts or obese butts, fishin?

Butts is butts. Either one will kill ya!

Everybody was thinner back then because people were more active and there were fewer fast food places.

I think it's computers and the internet that is making people fat. Hours and hours spend sitting in front of a screen.

I stopped smoking and never gained an ounce...for the first year. Then it got bad. I discovered the joys of the internet and sat idly stuffing food into my mouth all day long. Work called and I said I was recovering from swine flu. This was sort of true as I had eaten 4 pounds of bacon and 8 pork chops the night before. Eventually I got over my internet addiction and got out the door again (it took a while but eventually I figured out how to work that round twisty thing that opens it).

These days I am actually some 30 pounds lighter than I was when smoking, in part because I have more physical energy now and so I can move around better. Sadly I never did finish that last pack of Winston...such a loss.

Or even better, start smoking crack.

It's a great appetite suppressant. Rarely do you see a fat crackhead. And many people think supermodels are dumb bimbos, but they're smart enough to maintain a healthy coke addiction.

Slappy's onto something. You never see a fat drug addict.

Actually, I hear cocaine is a wonderful weight-loss remedy. (But if it isn't, you won't care)

Smoking nicotine may help, but avoid marijuana- it'll make you eat more.

Many of the friends of my youth were speed freaks. Skin and bones, every one of them.