An "Ask Auntie Lowan" Digression.

You'll need to tell me more about the nature of said critters.

Auntie Lowan cannot work in a vacuum, you know!


What are they saying about your cooking?

I would consider buying them an etiquette guide...visitors ought never to criticize one's cooking!

You may tell them I said so...unless they are grizzly bears. I am a little frightened of grizzly bears...

So, your open for business again, oh wise one?
Oh good!

Auntie Lowan, I find that I've made this sangria rather strong. But the taste is pleasant and mild on this late summer evening.

So, my question is, should I put on pants and go down to the gas station for a salty snack, or forego savory alimentation in favor for reasons of -- well, for reasons of sloth, but in the name of health and economy?

Have you got a kilt?

No, notAuntie Lowan, I'm off-kilter.

A towel?


(how formal are things out there on the hill?)

I am a frood who really knows where his towel is, but I'm sure that's even less acceptable for the local Citgo than the terrycloth robe I'm wearing now.

Hang loose, Grasshopper.

Oh wascally wabbit.

I have a condundrun. A nice A2Ker has indicated that there is a huge gap on this site for the mad rantings of an unemployable, half-drunken, mostly mad, father-of-three and former librarian. Should I accept this gig or just spend my loose cash on hard cider and the makings of martinis? I could also order some pizza and that salad I like.. you know the one with olives and fetta cheese... but no Balsamic vinegar, who the heck wants that crap anyhow? Jeez, a macchiato would be great too..

STILLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


PONDSCUM!!!!!!!

"Mostly" mad in the same sense that earth is "mostly" harmless.




I'll take the balsamic, you can keep your expensive burnt coffee...

You puttin' the boot in, Bootsy?

What, in the pond? But it'll get all scummy. And I suspect there're crocs in there...

Stilly....Yayyy!!!!!!!!!!!!!



With the exception of the father of three bit, sounds pretty much the story of my life!

Who's been peeking? Great to see you!

Into the Pondy.....I don't think there's crocs in Pondy.

Cracks, perhaps...but not crocs.

And I sense a huge pile of cow-droppings. This discussion is no futher to getting me work or a decent cup of coffee than it was yesterday.

I am also somewhat put out by the description of a sock, string, pipe cleaners, two buttons and a durrie as 'Auntie'. Now in Koori (indigenous Australian) parlance, *Koorie people call Elders 'Aunty' and 'Uncle' as a sign of respect. It does not always mean that people are closely related.*

Now, my question again. Why do they stick that balsamic vinegar onto my greek salad? And what the hell is balsamic vinegar anyhows? It looks like fricking sump-oil; have the Italians been playing a very sick joke on the rest of the world?

No...good balsamic vinegar is manna from heaven.

Is true. And even the cheap imitation crap ain't bad on a salad.

Mind you....some restraint helps.

feta cheese?