POOPIE,..Nominations For The Worst Movie Ever

Naming all the terrible movies is a formidable task. They continue to expand in number year after year. I admit that I like a number of them myself.

"Glen or Glenda," Ed Wood's effort that outdid "Plan 9 from Outer Space" for atrocious acting, direction, cinematography -- no redeeming features al all. It's like watching an accident happen. I understand that Madonna and her hubby's "Swept Away" should have been titled "Schlepped Away."

Thanks for the info Jerry...was actually interested in seeing that one...and if you couldnt tolerate it..it must be bad.

My top two are:

Boxing Helena:the first film I almost walked out of.I spent over an hour thinking "I´m going now" and I was just about to when the thing ended in an "oh,it was all a dream" way.ATROCIOUS.
Barb-Wire:no no no.Saw it on video and cursed myself for days.

Austin Powers <sorry fans> I rented it, watched approx five minutes, hit eject and immediately returned it so as not to be able to even think about it ever again.

I'm with you on Austin Powers, quinn.

I tried to watch a dreadful movie called Chain Reaction on TV yesterday - a waste of time.

I also nominate: Battlefield Earth, Baby Geniuses, Leonard Part 6

Titanic

Tune In Tomorrow - early 90s Keanu Reeves Peter Falk Barbara Hershey classic.

The WORST films ever? CdV, is there enough grunt available here at A2K?

Left early watching "Fire, Walk with Me" - what the hell was that about? The TV series was the best television I have ever seen. And this was David Lynch for chissakes, huh?

For me the battle at present is between Adam Sandler and Rob Schneider. I liked "The Wedding Singer", but why should I put up with that sort of crap? Is there some sort of competition between the two to make movie-goers suffer?

And if they think I'm going to take Sandler seriously because of one good role he had in Punch Drunk Love, they are seriously mistaken. I think Schneider is on the verge of passing up Sandler though, he's had 4 or 5 stinkers in just the last 18 months or so.

There is now an ANIMATED Adam Sandler film. I think that says heaps about his acting abilities (ie '**** it, can we go with a cartoon instead of the real Adam?' 'Sure thing, Boss').

I saw that advertised yesterday or maybe it was a short piece on an entertainment program. He plays multiple parts in it. He is a multi-talented amazing young man, and he has one of the greatest deals ever with Lucifer.

Sorry, that honour is the property of William Gates III!!!.

There's room there for more than one talentless movie star, corporate evil-doer, and a clueless president or two.

I believe I can outdo all of the previous posts. The worst movie ever made is "The Telephone", starring Whoppie Goldberg. The only other person I know that's ever seen this movie is my mother, but you don't have to take my word for it. Some reviews:

"In her one-woman show, Whoopi Goldberg was a fresh and original hit on Broadway. But The Telephone, which is essentially a one-woman movie, fails to ring any bells. The screenplay by Terry Southern and Harry Nilsson is mostly a series of monologues, with Goldberg, cast as an out-of-work actress, talking on her zebra-striped telephone. They might as well have asked Goldberg to carry off reading the phone book. This is a cheap, labor-intensive idea for a movie, but no amount of manic invention could have saved it. The Telephone is as dull as it is exhausting to watch. When Elliott Gould and John Heard pay brief visits to Goldberg's apartment, they do little to relieve the film's claustrophobia, but they offer some needed relief from her racing, steamroller monologues." -- New York Times

And from a viewer from Amazon:
Whoopie Goldberg is my favorite actress. Having said that, this is the worst film I've ever seen. I rented it expecting something totally different. I only watched the first 15 minutes and then turned it off. I've since found out what the ending is, but I'm not sure it justifies having to watch more than five minutes of film to get there



It's not even so bad that it's good. It's just awful.

Although I haven't actually seen it, from my perusal of the 'Worst Movies Ever' sort of listings the honour is reckoned to go to Paul Verhoeven's 1996 epic 'Showgirls'.



If anyone wants to Metacritic has a page full of reviews (http://www.metacritic.com/video/titles/showgirls). The most popular word is 'bad', other opinions include 'misogynistic swill', 'juvenile', 'cinematic saltpeter', 'bare-butted bore', 'akin to being keelhauled through a cesspool', 'bottom-feeder', 'That Berkely [the star] cannot act is indisputable', and 'impossiblly vulgar, tawdry and coarse'.

By POOPIE I understand bad, bad, bad, terrible. Not Titanic, not any Adam Sandler mediocrity, perhaps not even Boxing Helena, which is very lousy.

Bad, bad, bad, terrible films I've seen (and hereby propose):

The Twilight People, directed by Eddie Romero. A film sooo bad it's not even funnily bad.

Ace Ventura, When Nature Calls, forgettable director, made the original Ace Ventura seem like The Truman Show.

Peccato Veniale, by Salvatore Samperi, seems like a porno film; that is, two hours go excruciantingly by, you're absolutely bored and expecting the sex scene that should end it all. The sex scene arrives and it's so amateurishly filmed you get dizzy.

Frankenstein Meets the Space Monster, Gaffney is the "director's"
last name. "Frankenstein" is really a slowly moving NASA robot, the "Space Monsters" are Martians with toy guns in their hands who want to kidnap bikini-clad women.

La Risa en Vacaciones . This film ranks last in my list of 2058 movies. I admit I have an edge here, having seen a few Mexican Z movies. Compared to this flick, any average Candid Camera show is a Kubrick masterpiece. (Suffice to say it is the favorite film of Jorge Litvak, the multimonikered psychotic Mexican abuzzer who lives in Acapulco and can't type.)

Fbaezer,you obviously have an edge on most due to your wide knowledge of "Psychotronic" movies.I too love Z rate schlock.
Maltin wrote something VERY funny about Teen Wolf TOO:"so bad it makes the original look like Preston Sturgess in his prime."
For once I smiled while reading his film guide.

EYES WIDE SHUT is a strong contender for the title. Maybe it was the fact that such a talented director as Kubrick could make such absolute drivel made it seem even worse than it really was.