Will We Have Genitalia In Heaven?

Damn...I just watched 'Dogma' again recently and thought "Man, if I go to heaven and meet muse Salma Hayek in her stripper outfit with no dick, I would be seriously pissed off."

As far as I know, in honesty, angels have no genitalia, but humans do, and I think that applies to heaven as well.

Actually Cav, the shocking thing is that we are seriously talking as though we might get to heaven......

God is a lawyer with fine print, independent clauses, and a good eye for setting precedent. I believe he/she considers the severity of sin in passing judgement on who enters heaven. I see us marching together through the pearly gates (heh, pearls always remind me of necklaces) shouting out "So long Dubya! We were just smartasses! You was a dumbass!" Then St. Peter will write up a little note saying "This is parody, and in no way reflects the opinions of the intended people involved in the goal of getting into heaven, and even if it does, to persecute them for that would be considered slander, and heaven has great friggin' lawyers, despite all those jokes."

i'm sure we will... in the other place.

Yeah, but constant crotch-burn is pretty nasty.

Is that anything like "Cheeseburgers in Paradise"?

Maybe you could him a few bars!

I certainly hope not! I do not look forward to an eternity of PMS, menstruation, and bras. We could still cuddle and even have virtual sex, without the mess ...

Woman's heaven- man's hell

you can have genitalia without pms and menstruation...ask my 90 year old Aunt Gertrude......

a bottle with a hole in it, a woman without one...Panzade.....that's hell....

You won't need any genitalia in heaven, unless you plan on plucking your harp strings with it, because that's what you'll be doing all the time, plucking a harp. Have fun.

Did you say plucking a harp?

I'm going to play mine through a mesa triple rec with a Zakk Wyllde stomp box......

More importantly, will geezers have new ones replacing their old wore out ones.

Yes, so don't plucking harp on!



Now someone has started such a discussion I am going to ask the big questions about the afterlife that disturb me greatly........

Disturbing thought No. 1:

We leave our phsyical (corporeal) bodies behind. OK. Then we are re-born/re-animated in a 'new' body. Seeing that there is no physical manifestation of an afterlife, it is not PHYSICAL. Without a physical body to feel or have the usual sorts of sensations, HOW DOES IT WORK?

We are still supposed to feel fear and pain and love in the afterlife. How? No nerves, no chemical transmitters in the brain, no hunger or thirst, no sexual desire. Hell is full of everlasting suffering and pain. I don't feel anything. Torment a non-existent body, big deal.

The after-life sounds sort of boring, doesn't it, Mr S?

Distubing thought No. 2:

Do we have the same sort of relationships in the afterlife that we do here?

I get married, my wife dies. I get over it. And marry again. We both die married to each other.

I am then in Heaven lawfully married to TWO wives (or vice-versa for the ladies). What to do? If I married both times within the Church and fully expected to fulfil the my vows I'm sunk. I have broken holy law and I'm sent to Hell.