@anto900,
You are not infected. You had an AIDS test done by professionals. They say it is negative. That means, conclusively, that you are not infected with HIV.
Your symptoms are symptoms of something else.
Is it possible that your symptoms are psychological? If this was happening to me, I would certainly talk to a medical doctor. I might also go see a psychotherapist. There are many times that emotional responses to something, guilt or anger for example, can provoke physical symptoms.
A psychotherapist might be able to help with that.